Developer on phone with admin: Yeah, just add it to the list. The account name is 'consumer', password 'buttfucker'. Thanks.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Mr. the Snake
Developer on phone with admin: Yeah, just add it to the list. The account name is 'consumer', password 'buttfucker'. Thanks.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Mr. the Snake
Female customer: My sunglasses are broken. One of the screws fell out, and a guy in here yesterday said they would replace them with a new pair.
Woman behind counter: Oh, I remember you. You’re just looking for a screw, right?
Female customer, after entire store stops laughing: Aren’t we all, really?
1051 North Rush Street
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Standing behind you
Coworker: I’ve got more Vaseline than a porn star could use in a year.
330 North Wabash Avenue
Chicago, Illinois
Coworker #1: What kind of creamer is that?
Coworker #2: It's Bailey's.
Coworker #1: You put Bailey's in your coffee at work?
Coworker #2: Yeah, I always put Bailey's in my coffee. It's not that strong or anything.
Coworker #1: Can I get some of that?
Des Plaines, Illinois
24-year-old hotel suit: Excuse me, sir, can I help you find something?
Meeting attendee, wandering around: Yes! Where is room TBD?!
Fancy hotel
Rosemont, Illinois
Overheard by: Jaw dropping in disbelief
Foreign coworker: What does it mean, ‘nappy-headed hos’?
333 Wacker Drive
Chicago, Illinois
Supervisor: Well, if that’s the case, all I need is a panda, a gun, and a bottle of wine.
Naperville, Illinois
Woman #1: I hate living alone.
Woman #2: I love living alone.
Woman #1: It sucks going home to nobody, having nobody to talk to — it just sucks.
Woman #2: You want to live together?
Woman #1: No!
Motorola, 1301 East Algonquin Road
Schaumburg, Illinois
Girl #1: Hey, do you want to do the Ann Landers 5k with me?
Girl #2: Ann Landers has her own 5k?
Girl #1: Yeah, it’s to raise money for whatever she died of.
Girl #2: I thought she just died of being old. Wouldn’t it be awesome if there was a 5k to raise money to prevent old?
835 N. Michigan Avenue
Chicago, Illinois
Ditzy member of upper management: No, it's not internal, it's out-ternal.
Schaumburg, Illinois
