Coworker #1: We have a woman janitor now. Things have been awkward to say the least.
Coworker #2: Well, you can't discriminate, though. Women janitors need to work too.
Coworker #1: Nothing like having her walk in on you while you are standing at the urinal…or taking a poop and hear somebody walk in and then walk out. And then when you exit the restroom, she is waiting outside the door with rubber gloves and a can of Lysol.
Fairmont, West Virginia
Office worker: Oh, finally! This piece of dead skin came off.
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Heather
Woman on phone: After I had that conversation with my mom about stealing my dog's Xanax, it's been downhill.
40th & Lexington
Manhattan, New York
Secretary #1: I have Mountain Dew.
Secretary #2: Excuse me?
Secretary #1: I have Mountain Dew. (pause) My boobs are sweating.
Wilmington, Delaware
Woman on phone: You shaved today? Wow! You're such a big boy!
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Ellen
Cafeteria worker: Urinating in the Caesar!
Harvard, Illinois
Overheard by: Dave
Teenage worker: Did you listen to that Tooth Tunes toothbrush I got you?
20-something blond worker: Yeah, I was brushing my teeth naked and dancing to it this morning.
Tallahassee, Florida
HR to CEO: No retort needed, Timmy, the proof is in the pudding.
CEO: Mmmmm…pudding!
Lafayette, Indianapolis
Overheard by: Ag dEsigner
Male disability attorney, venting to paralegal: I just kept thinking. Seriously, how can you not get your paperwork done? You're disabled, what else do you have to do?
Twin Cities, Minnesota
Overheard by: Hillary E Us
Accounting woman: I am leaking.
Accounting manager: I heard you just went to the doctor.
Northbrook, Illinois
Overheard by: fishbones
