Disgruntled woman: Did you get my e-mail?
Boss: Yes, but you’re so consistently negative I didn’t bother to read it. Plus, your e-mails are always too long.
Disgruntled woman: What?
Boss: From now on, you’re limited to two paragraphs– No! Two sentences. And try to be positive for a change.
Chantilly, Virginia
Woman: …and the doctor was like, “I’ve never seen so much wax in one ear before!”, and I was like, “Can we just get on with this already? I’m on vacation in Hawaii!”.
1745 Broadway
New York, NY
Cube rat: Damn the metric system!
State College, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Word.
Worker bee: I won’t spend 60 dollars on something I can’t shoot my friends with.
11145 Westheimer Road
Houston, Texas
Overheard by: me either
Client: You need to fix this design; the text is way too big.
Web designer: What is the text size in your browser set to?
Client: It’s on large so I can read it better.
1335 Columbus Avenue
San Francisco, California
Male teen: I sent her to get it, but you know you can't trust Lisa with cheap beer.
Rogers, Arizona
Overheard by: Joel
Employee #1: So basically, I’m going to wear a shirt that says, ‘Ghouls Gone Wild’ on it.
Employee #2: You can’t do that! You have to dress slutty!
Sixforks and Strickland
Raleigh, North Carolina
Overheard by: Heather
Co-worker #1: You smell of fish!
Co-worker #2: I’ve been at a fishmongers!
Co-worker #1: Oh! I thought it was an urban myth but they actually do sell fish at a fishmongers?
Co-worker #2: …What?
Commercial Road
Hull, East Yorkshire
UK
Overheard by: Simon Green
Canadian woman: Things have been so strange around here lately with all the closed door meetings and whispering. Even my dog was really restless the other night, but I think she was sensing the earthquake and possible tsunami.
4027 Tampa Road
Oldsmar, Florida
Employee: Don’t interrupt me now, interrupt me when I am finished!
1200 10th Avenue South
Birmingham, Alabama
