Boss: We are a team. If you tell me that you cannot work on your day off, then you are not being a very good team member.
1119 N. Brown
Casa Grande, Arizona
Overheard by: Alisa
Boss: We are a team. If you tell me that you cannot work on your day off, then you are not being a very good team member.
1119 N. Brown
Casa Grande, Arizona
Overheard by: Alisa
Coworker #1: Our annual report is going to be delivered today. Please let me know when it arrives.
Coworker #2: How often do we get that?
University of Michigan, Ann Arbor
Secretary #1: Is Chicago near Detroit?
Secretary #2: I don’t think so. Chicago is in Illinois, isn’t it?
Secretary #1: Illinois…yeah, I think so.
Secretary #2: I think Illinois is pretty big.
Secretary #1: So that’s not near Detroit?
Secretary #2: Well, isn’t Detroit in Illinois?
Secretary #1: Uh, isn’t it? So are they close together?
8200 Greensboro Drive
McLean, Virginia
Bored tech guy: Can I help you?
Bimbette: Yeah, um, I need an update on my anti-Semitic virus program.
Bored tech guy: You mean ‘Symantec’?
Bimbette: Yeah, that’s what I said — anti-Semitic.
Quinnipiac University
Hamden, Connecticut
Worker #1: Hi, Sally*, my ID has expired. How can I get it renewed?
Worker #2: I suppose the other people on our team will also be expiring soon, too. Do we need to address them now, or should we wait ’til they actually expire also?
55 East Hartland Street
East Hartford, Connecticut
Overheard by: Linda BoBinda
Customer: Hello, Phyllis, how are you today?
Worker: I’m not Phyllis, I’m Kay.
Customer: Your name tag says Phyllis.
Worker: No, it doesn’t. It says Kay, see? P-H-Y… oops!… wrong name tag.
Westmoreland Mall
Greensburg, Pennsylvania
Secretary: If we fax something to someone, and our machine is out of ink, will they still get it?
Albuquerque, New Mexico
Overheard by: Reception
Co-worker #1: Goodness! I can’t tell you how dusty this thing is.
Co-worker #2: Why not?
Co-worker #1: Because I don’t know the proper units of measurement for dust.
105 Arbor Drive
Christiansburg, Virginia
Sous chef, passing behind inept intern: Behind you.
(intern backs into him)
Sous chef: Uh, hey…
Intern: I didn't know which direction you were coming from!
Vermont
Overheard by: I know front from back
Program manager #1, in midst of cubical maze: Hey, where did all that bacon go?
Program manager #2, chanting happily: Bacon bacon bacon!
Utah
Overheard by: Snickering Intern
