Manager: You hear her? Usually, she says, “I’m coming”, and I say “So is Christmas.” But now I guess I could say, “So is”, uh, “the Fourth of July.”
11400 West Olympic Boulevard
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: lonecomic
Manager: You hear her? Usually, she says, “I’m coming”, and I say “So is Christmas.” But now I guess I could say, “So is”, uh, “the Fourth of July.”
11400 West Olympic Boulevard
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: lonecomic
Home health nurse: Good morning, Mr Smith*. May I take your blood pressure?
Alzheimer's patient: Well, I don't know! What'll you give me for it?
Buena Park, California
Overheard by: his pastor
Professor: Yes, the Chinese are very oriental.
Muncie, Indiana
Overheard by: She's teaching us?
Co-worker: I was trying to fix the report, but it is unedible.
Boss: It doesn’t taste good?
222 Severn Avenue
Annapolis, Maryland
Overheard by: Tits McGee
Receptionist: Thank you for calling XYZ Inc*.
Customer: Yes, I just received a call from this number on my phone. Who are you again?
Receptionist: XYC Inc. Do you..?
Customer: Oh, yeah! I ordered from you guys! Did my order come in yet?
Receptionist: I have no idea sir. What is y…
Customer: Oh, you probably need my name, huh?
Receptionist: That would help.
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Cat
Blonde peon: Oooh, this song is so pretty! I love it.
Male coworker: What, the ‘Star-Spangled Banner’?
Blonde peon: No, the national anthem.
9055 East Mineral Circle
Centennial, Colorado
Overheard by: Aaron M Gomez
Teacher running in, glancing around wildly: Anyone got a lighter?
Preschool
Denver, Colorado
Designer: The image is 144 by 216.
Writer: What the hell kind of dimensions are those?
Designer: 144 is 2 inches. Pretty standard. And–
Writer: Fine, but what is this 216 business?
Designer: Are you kidding me? Do some math. It’s three inches.
Writer: Oh. Well, how should I know? You know I’m not one to mess around with anything two or three inches.
16340 North Scottsdale Road
Scottsdale, Arizona
Woman #1: I want a boy! How do I make a boy?
Woman #2: Like a baby?
Woman #1: Yeah, like a baby boy.
Woman #3: Well, my cousin did it! There's one way to get a girl, and another way to make a boy. I can ask him if you want.
Manhattan, New York
Clerk: What is your occupation, ma’am?
Girl: Umm, a co-worker.
1 S. Maple Street
Jamestown, Ohio
