Academic advisor #1: Isn't there some lake in Utah with a lot of salt in it?
Academic advisor #2: Salt… Lake… City?
Des Moines, Iowa
Academic advisor #1: Isn't there some lake in Utah with a lot of salt in it?
Academic advisor #2: Salt… Lake… City?
Des Moines, Iowa
Manager: Why are you guys just sitting there? What’s going on?
Underling: I’m helping her with her mouse. It looks like her computer froze.
Manager: Well, you shouldn’t let it get so cold.
8484 Wilshire Boulevard
Los Angeles, California
Co-worker #1: These new pants are great. I can spill anything on them and it just brushes right off. I wish I knew how they did it.
Co-worker #2: It’s nanotechnology.
7 Times Square
New York, NY
Coworker: Hey, Paul*, my daughter just learned to say ‘Thank you’ in Chinese.
Paul: That’s great. Sounds like a smart kid.
Coworker: Yeah! I think I’m gonna tell Amy*.
Paul: Amy’s Korean
Coworker: Isn’t it the same thing?
1234 Brookdale Drive
Glendale Heights, Illinois
Older IT guy: I live by the rule of thumb: “If the stick's not bigger than your thumb, you can beat 'em with it!” (laughs) Okay, now, go to your sent box…
Sparks, Maryland
Overheard by: Operator
Cube guy #1: Wow, that girl with Tina* is hot. Who is she?
Cube guy #2: That’s her daughter.
Cube guy #1: Damn, man! Why isn’t she my daughter?
Cube guy #2: What does that mean?
Cube guy #1: I dunno. I meant–
Cube guy #2: –Dude, that means you’d have to sleep with–
Cube guy #1: –I know, I know, I’m sorry! Messed up… You didn’t have to give me the visual.
Scottsdale, Arizona
Overheard by: Cube Guru
Office drone: Why is everyone staring at me?
Office chick: You're fun to look at.
Mesquite, Nevada
Boss: From now on, people, we’re going to make Perfection our baseline.
The development team laughs.
Developer: Dude, whatever the fuck you’ve been reading, stop it.
1 Madison Avenue
New York, NY
Overheard by: Mad William Flint
Straight cube-dweller, about hole punch: Well, it shouldn't go there. It should be out in the open on the desk where I can see it.
Gay cube-dweller: What, you couldn't see it sitting there?
Straight cube-dweller: Well, it lives on my desk, not in the closet.
Gay cube-dweller: It's a shelf above your desk, not a closet.
Straight cube-dweller: Well, you would know more about closets than shelves, wouldn't you?
West Lafayette, Indiana
Manager: What time is my meeting with you?
Employee: I don't know. I got your e-mail, but didn't know you were talking about, so I deleted it.
Broadway & Walker
New York City
Overheard by: office peon hates meetings
