Financial Folk

Real Estate Agent: So she totally knows this guy that’s on The Real OC; he’s a loan guy that she used to work with.
Loan Rep: What character does he play?
Real Estate Agent: He’s a loan rep.
Loan Rep: I know, but what character does he play?

22342 Avenida Empresa
Rancho Santa Margarita, California

Cashier to another: Most of our customers are dumber than dirt, and they've got guns.

New York City, New York

Overheard by: Locked & Loaded

Tax guy, planning baby shower and creating a gag gift: Hey Laurel, I need your six nipples first thing in the morning!

Kansas City, Missouri

Overheard by: Erin

Accountant, about a bruised banana: Oh, was it beating around in your bush?

Toronto
Canadia

Broker #1: Ok, here’s one: would you rather lick the bulge on Johnny’s* leg or eat the skin that Peter* peeled off his foot last year?
Broker #2: As sick as this sounds, I’d take Johnny’s bulge in a second. I had to sit next to Peter. His foot had a crack in it so deep you could stick a pencil in it.

440 South LaSalle
Chicago, Illinois

Customer: I need to send an international wire transfer for 1,000 euros please.
Teller: Okay, let me check…yeah, we can do that. How much is that in money?
Customer: Excuse me?
Teller: How much is that in money?
Customer: Do you mean how much is it in US dollars?
Teller: Yeah, how much is it in money?

Nashville, Tennessee

Overheard by: Currency Expert

Fundraiser: Hey, man, I need to raise some money for Multiple Dystrophy…[to other guy at table] Yo, man, what does the “A” stand for?

Muscular Dystrophy Association telethon
Miami, Florida

CPA, referring to Buddhist temple client: For me, karma is like retained earnings.

Ft. Lauderdale, Florida

Overheard by: George

Young receptionist: I keep finding cat scratches all over me!
Female accounts: Do you even have a cat?
Young receptionist: Yeah, I had to wash him.
Female accounts: Why in the hell would you wash a cat, they're self-cleaning!

Croydon Road
Australia

Financial analyst: Guys will say, ‘Oh, Asian women are so exotic,’ like we’re a commodity. I’m not a rug!

Wall Street
New York, New York