New hire: Lord, I am not drinking any of this company’s water. There are entirely too many pregnant people here.
9106 E. Panorama Circle
Englewood, Colorado
Overheard by: Homer Thompson
New hire: Lord, I am not drinking any of this company’s water. There are entirely too many pregnant people here.
9106 E. Panorama Circle
Englewood, Colorado
Overheard by: Homer Thompson
Employee #1: Oh, so you are talking apples and oranges?
Employee #2: No, I am talking about two different things.
701 Park Avenue
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Office girl on phone: I finally found out why my hamsters aren't fucking! I have three girls!
Denham Springs, Louisiana
Overheard by: Erin
Lady peon #1: Chipotle’s burritos are, like, so good!
Lady peon #2: Yeah, I know. Carol*, have you ever had one?
Carol: Uh, I’ve never been out of the country…
5813 South Kenwood Avenue
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: wow
Co-worker #1: How do you spell “pseudo”?
Co-worker #2: S-U–
Co-worker #1: That doesn’t seem right. Is there an H?
270 Sylvan Avenue
Englewood Cliffs, New Jersey
Desk monkey #1: I heard she and her boyfriend had Brazilian waxes done together. The man’s treatment is called the ‘free willy wax.’
Desk monkey #2: Oooh! Can you do that? I mean, you can’t wax a man’s balls!
Netherlands
Overheard by: Ouch!
Male grunt: If my mouse stops working, I’m going to go home.
Female grunt: Well, did you try jiggling it?
Male grunt: Yeah, I jiggled the shit out of it. [Female grunt giggles.]
Foggy Bottom
Washington, DC
Male worker to female lunch companion: See, the good thing about you is that you can really pack it in. I mean, most girls can’t do that.
12th and G Street NW
Washington, DC
Overheard by: i like to eat too
Customer: Hi, can I get hold of Czech crowns here?
Bank flunky: Uhh…What was his first name again?
ASB Bank, Great North Road
Auckland, New Zealand
Clerk trying to price-check produce: Now, how is it you spell cucumber? Is that with a K or a Q?
Supermarket
Biloxi, Mississippi
