Sergeant: I need you to call an ambulance for a 32-year-old pregnant woman.
Control room operator: What do I tell them is wrong with her?
Sergeant: Well, she’s pregnant!
Clark County Detention Center
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: cro
Sergeant: I need you to call an ambulance for a 32-year-old pregnant woman.
Control room operator: What do I tell them is wrong with her?
Sergeant: Well, she’s pregnant!
Clark County Detention Center
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: cro
Coworker, about a newborn: Then her husband cut the Biblical cord…
171 17th Street NW
Atlanta, Georgia
Customer: Ummm… What's in a veggie sandwich?
(short pause)
Employee: Uh, veggies.
(short pause)
Customer: Oh. Okay. I'll have a veggie sandwich.
Subway Sandwich Shop
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: 'Chelle
Customer service girl eating from Christmas popcorn tin: Ew! These are sterile!
6141 Riverside Drive
Riverside, California
Overheard by: sylvie
Dumbest: He said he had a stomach ache so I gave him some Aflac–you know, rolodex?
Less Dumb: Antacids? Rolaids?
7th and Congress
Austin, Texas
Office peon: No matter how many pairs of underwear you have, if you don’t do your laundry, eventually you will run out.
501 Jackson Street
Topeka, Kansas
Overheard by: Laughing at everyone
Loud lady on cell: [Supervisor] called this morning to see if I was coming in. What does he care? I had a meeting this morning with him and Sam*. What were they going to do, ask me why I haven’t been performing well? Did they want me to say I’ve asked to be transferred more than once because I’ve been sleeping with my supervisor and he won’t stop harassing me? You know, I probably shouldn’t be talking about this right in front of my office.
371 Hoes Lane
Piscataway, New Jersey
Overheard by: Justtryingtohaveacigarette
Employee #1: Can you print the report for the meeting?
Employee #2: Should I print a copy for everyone who will be there?
Employee #1: No, one should be fine; all 15 of them can crowd around and look at it together.
2240 North 1st Street
San Jose, California
Worker #1: Ohmigod! I was typing a letter and I was typing really fast and instead of typing “tots” I typed “tits”!
Worker #2, underwhelmed: Really? That's funny.
Worker #1: No, really!! I typed “tits,” like t-i-t-s, at least I think that's how you spell it.
Jefferson City, Missouri
Customer: Hello, Phyllis, how are you today?
Worker: I’m not Phyllis, I’m Kay.
Customer: Your name tag says Phyllis.
Worker: No, it doesn’t. It says Kay, see? P-H-Y… oops!… wrong name tag.
Westmoreland Mall
Greensburg, Pennsylvania
