Woman: Well, it’s time for me to go back to jail now.
3000 Washington Hall
West Point, New York
Woman: Well, it’s time for me to go back to jail now.
3000 Washington Hall
West Point, New York
Co-worker: Well, if I am being stalked by phone, at least it’s by a funny stalker.
175 5th Avenue
New York, NY
Co-worker on phone: Huh? I’m stalking you? How do you know?
420 Lexington Avenue
New York, NY
Clerk: I saw you driving earlier, did you get your license back?
Customer: Yeah, it's all good now. If I could only stay out of the bar…
Clerk: You don't think there's a connection between those two things?
Customer: What do you mean?
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: BFS
Opposing counsel: Can you take a leap of faith and eliminate paragraph 6 of the Agreement?
Partner: I think it would be malpractice for me to do so.
Opposing counsel: Malpractice per se, no; but probably not very wise of you either.
Huntington, New York
Overheard by: Lady Lawyer
Rowdy male coworker: So the third time I went to jail, I was outside of this bank…
Train station
Bronxville, New York
Overheard by: Beth Ann
Girl #1: I hate our supervisor and her stupid flicky long hair.
Girl #2: I just want to go up to her and just cut her hair off.
Guy: I just want to cut her throat.
Girl #1: I would love to do that, but it's illegal.
Guy: So would cutting her hair, unless you were her hairdresser.
Girl #2: I can just see it now?
Guy: When you go to court?
Girl: When I cut her hair, I was actually aiming for her throat, for this, your honor, I am…
Together: Extremely sorry.
Sydney
Australia
Programmer #1: But I'd have a justified reason to kill you.
Programmer #2: Huh?
Programmer #1: You punched a kitten.
Adelaide
Australia
Woman #1 in charity shop: He was in here for a long time, behaving oddly, and the other chap kept coming in and whispering to him and I was worried they were gonna steal something.
Woman #2 in charity shop: So he wasn't?
Woman #1 in charity shop: No, he was having a panic attack and the other one was his carer.
Woman #2 in charity shop: What was wrong with him?
Woman #1 in charity shop: I think he may have been homophobic…
London
England
