Female coworker #1: I just haven't been feeling well lately.
Female coworker #2: Do you want to suck on something?
Westminster, California
Female coworker #1: I just haven't been feeling well lately.
Female coworker #2: Do you want to suck on something?
Westminster, California
Employee to another: So she lost her two front teeth saving the potbellied pig jumping in the pool.
Silver Spring, Maryland
Coworker to intern: So do you want to have a two hour jam session? For Jesus!
Tulsa, Oklahoma
Overheard by: claire
Male coworker: What's up with everybody being sick right now?
Female coworker: Seriously! I was sick a few days ago and went to the walk-in clinic. The doctor gave me an antibiotic but I didn't take it. I gave it to my husband because he's sick too.
Male coworker: What do you mean you didn't take it? Why are you being non-compliant with treatment?
Female coworker: Well, this is probably TMI, but I can't take antibiotics. They give me yeast infections.
Columbus, Indiana
Overheard by:
Female worker: I've been here so long, I can think of a million ways to get back at you.
Male worker: I'll just come in and start throwing water balloons.
Female worker: That's like stabbing, though.
Wall Street
New York City, New York
Overheard by: Tonic
Worker #1: I don't think he looks like John Candy. I think he looks like the guy who killed John Candy.
Worker #2: With what? Donuts?
Lakeside Avenue
Cleveland, Ohio
Overheard by: Not paid enough.
Coworker #1: I almost said something stupid, but I stopped myself.
Coworker #2: Did it hurt?
Coworker #1: Yeah, a little.
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Miranda
Grumpy loud guy to confused coworker: Stop going out and drinking your lunch!
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Coworker #1, holding small letter opener: Do you have one of these, only smaller?
Coworker #2: What's wrong with that one?
Coworker #1: It's too thick. I can't fit in in the smaller slits and it tears the whole thing apart most of the time.
Coworker #3: I had a boyfriend like that once.
Coworker #2: What the fuck?
Santa Ana, California
Overheard by: errica
Cube dweller #1: My cousin was in the hospital last week.
Cube dweller #2: Yeah? My brother was in the hospital last week. He had an operation to remove…ummm, something.
Cube dweller #1: What, his tonsils?
Cube dweller #2: No, it started with “p.”
Cube dweller #1: Oh, gawd, not his prostate?
Cube dweller #2: No… Oh, yeah. It was his pendix.
Tampa, Florida
