Cute gay guy: Tome Cruise and Katie Holmes were looking for an apartment on my street.
Female coworker: Oh, really?
Cute gay guy: Yeah, I live on Toorak Road. If they move there, I wanna steal Suri. And have crazy bum sex on my balcony! (demonstrates by thrusting in the air) Take that, Scientology!
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: Giggling
Coworker #1: It was amazing. He was the first blind man to climb mount Everest. He was in the news and everything.
Coworker #2: Did they say anything about his dog?
Coworker #1: What?
Waterloo
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Meesh
Coworker #1: Have you filed your travel voucher for that conference in Indianapolis?
Coworker #2: Yes.
Coworker #1: Let me see your copy so I can fill mine out correctly.
Coworker #2: Here you go.
Coworker #1: Let’s see. You used the year ’05 instead of ’06, did not provide departure/arrival times, omitted your social security number, and didn’t total the round trip mileage and mileage reimbursement columns. Thanks.
4555 Central Avenue
Columbus, Indiana
Office drone #1: I see you've got a machete.
Office drone #2, wistfully: Who doesn't, in this workaday world?
Williamsburg, Virginia
Overheard by: Stunned into silence
Female coworker: Hey there, sweetie. Did you have fun yesterday?
Male coworker: Huh?
Female coworker: You had the day off, didn't you?
Male coworker: I was at a funeral. My grandmother died.
Westlake
Seattle, Washington
20-something in scrubs #1: The one I really like is Jared*.
20-something in scrubs #2: Jared?
20-something in scrubs #1: Yeah. When we’re together I can really control him.
Hospital, 399 Bathurst Street
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Lady on phone: No, he did not get in. He did make an attempt, but things went south from there… I was wearing my skirt with the slit up the side. Nooo, you can only see somethin’ when I am sitting down… Because I am a lady.
18th and L Street NW
Washington, DC
Office peon: Well, guess who one of them was? Guess who one of the lesbian gypsies was?!
202 West 1st Street
Los Angeles, California
Cube rat #1: Could you stop? That's annoying me.
Cube rat #2: Jim, feel free to suck it.
Radnor, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: CubeKing
Old lady coworker, about four-year-old niece: I’m minding Lydia* tonight, so I thought I’d leave early to read the directions on the macaroni and cheese.
1500 JFK Boulevard
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: it takes an hour
