Newly hired girl, learning computer system: *gasp* Oh my god, I just figured out why Chevron gas stations are called Chevron!
(senior girl rolls eyes)
Newly hired girl, a minute later: *gasp!*
Senior girl: What? Did you just figure out what Shell gas stations are named after?
Vancouver
Canadia
Overheard by: why did we hire her again?
Employee #1: So the guy in jail I was telling you about, he’s dead! [Laughs]Employee #2: Ooh, that’s great for you then, right?
Employee #1: No, it was the wrong guy. There were two guys sitting in jail, and one of them died, but it was the wrong one.
Employee #2: So you owe your friend money?
Employee #1: Well not until the other guy dies. [pause] This is pretty morbid isn’t it?
Sparks Street
Ottawa, Canadia
Overheard by: a poor little intern
Chick on cell: Uh-huh… Yeah. Okay. Call me later. [Snaps phone shut and turns to friend, loudly] So, oh my god, she has chlamydia and–
Horrified retail guy: –Okay, I didn’t hear that…
Chick on cell: I did not say it that loudly… right?
Horrified friend: Yeah, you really did…
Shop 13, 1100 Pacific Highway
Canadia
Overheard by: Not that loud…
Office manager: I’m going to Google time travel!
Winnipeg, Manitoba
Canadia
Overheard by: The Office Bitch
Finance controller: Semantics matter when you're getting screwed!
Brampton
Ontario
Canadia
Thug #1: Yo, man, this place is lined up!
Thug #2: Yo, this place got more lines than algebra class.
Thug #1: Man, this place prob’ly got more signs in it.
Thug #2: Fo’ sho’. It prob’ly got more cosines in it, too.
Coliseum Ottawa, 3090 Carling Avenue
Ottawa, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Beth
Boss: James, where's the flag?
Teenage employee: I don't know.
Boss: You were just wearing it around your shoulders.
Teenage employee: Oh, my superhero cape! It's right here.
BC
Canadia
Supervisor, discussing camps kids who are too old: They have mustaches!
Coordinator: It's not their fault they're hairy!
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: a co-ordinator who knows better
Chick: Hello?
Dude: Hey.
Chick: Take me off speakerphone!
Dude: [Picks up phone] Don’t order me around like that!
Chick: Ha, ha… I like how you took me off speakerphone first and then told me not to order you around.
Dude: You are such a princess… Am I on speakerphone?
Chick: Yup.
Dude: Jerk.
403 & Highway 10
Mississauga, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: who’s the boss?
