California

Server #1: So he deals drugs to kids?
Server #2: Well… Indirectly.

Los Angeles, California

Coworker on phone: I kinda just rub it underwater.

Stockton, California

Manager, training new employees: So… Sexual harassment. Just don't do it.
Dreadlocked newbie: What about dry humping behind the butcher counter?

Escondido, California

Overheard by: This is a health food store…

Designer, walking into boss' office: Hi.
Boss: Hi.
Designer: Hi.
Manager: Hi.
Designer to CEO: Hi.
(CEO laughs)
Designer: What's so funny?
CEO: I was enjoying the “hi”s. I wanna know what comes after the “hi”s.
Boss: The lows.

Culver City, California

Secretary: Isn't he the one that died?
File clerk, busy typing: Yes.
Secretary: Oh. Okay, well, I won't send the e-mail to him, then.
File clerk, mumbling while typing: Wow.

Riverside, California

Boss, walking by: If I'm going to go to Jupiter I'll have to leave the office.

Chico, California

Overheard by: Corgi

Guy to Egyptian coworker: Pam*, it's your song–Egyptian lover!
(Egyptian coworker just stares at him)

Santa Barbara, California

Director to room full of environmentalists: Well, I know I already shot my wad…

Sacramento, California

Overheard by: Erin

Coworker to another who has just put basket on his head: It's like you're playing “Amish tron” or something…

Hollywood, California

Overheard by: scrapes

Disgruntled middle aged CSR, answering phone: Hello. (pause) Oh, just at this stupid meaningless job. How are you?

Aliso Viejo, California