The boss: Some people call it stupidity; I like to call it cleverness.
550 Dulany Street
Alexandria, Virginia
Overheard by: Toni
The boss: Some people call it stupidity; I like to call it cleverness.
550 Dulany Street
Alexandria, Virginia
Overheard by: Toni
Boss to underling: We have Kleenex?! Why? There's perfectly good toilet paper in the bathroom!
Chicago, Illinois
Systems Engineer: How long will it take for you to implement [the customer]’s changes?
Engineer: About two-three weeks. So four weeks.
Systems Engineer: Good. And how long will it take you to make your changes?
Intern: Well, I already did it, and it took an hour.
Systems Engineer: Okay, I’ll tell them five weeks total.
1440 N. Fiesta Boulevard
Gilbert, Arizona
Teen employee: I’m so worried about getting into college. Although, I really don’t know what I want to do with my life.
Middle-aged boss: You’d make a great stripper.
Teen employee: You know, I’ve considered it.
Bookstore
New York, New York
Overheard by: I guess I won’t apply for a job after all
Boss: Well, I’m outta here! Too bad you have to stay!
Janitor: You’re not letting him leave early?
Boss: No. I’m the boss. I get to go. He has to stay.
Janitor: Okay. Well, bye.
Boss: Bye! [He leaves]Janitor: So you’re leaving in five minutes, right?
Employee: I’ll wait ’til he clears the building.
59 Maiden Lane
New York, New York
Boss to underling: How's that look over there? Is it in yet?
College
Portland, Oregon
Underling: So do I submit my yearly review to you or Robert?
Boss: Why are you being so anal about the reviews? They don't matter anyway.
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Manager: Ok. Since it seems like [Dougie] doesn’t want to be a part of the team and show up for meetings, [Steve], from now on, when you send out meeting requests, make sure the invitation is sent to him personally.
[Steve]: So basically, I should click a few more times to enable this otherwise unacceptable behavior?Manager: Right.
[Steve]: Got it.214 West 39th Street
New York, New York
Supervisor: Are these numbers right?
Employee: Yeah, I double-checked.
Supervisor: The sales manager said that they were under budget!
Employee: Well, numbers don’t lie. Salespeople do.
17777 Center Court Drive
Cerritos, California
Ladder-climber to boss: If you don't have a good enough argument for why I'm wrong, then I'm right.
Ohio
