White girl: Jesus, I just got called a nigger!
Filipino girl: What? On your break?
White girl: Yeah! And by a black person. Homeless. Wouldn’t give her money. I’m about as cracker as you get… total whitey. I mean, I’m wearing Banana Republic.
1900 Broadway
Oakland, California
Cute office peon: What’s wrong, Tom*?
Tom: I’m just feeling a little depressed today.
Cute office peon: Why?
Tom: I had planned this party over the weekend, and no one showed up.
Cute office peon: Don’t feel bad about that, Tom. It’s not your fault that your friends can’t come!
5500 University Parkway
San Bernardino, California
Overheard by: And she knows this how?
Blonde: Mmm… It smells so good in here. Doesn’t it smell good in here? I love it! I just want to eat what’s in my nose right now!
Friend: I know!
Arkansas
Woman sipping her soda through a straw, the day after the super bowl: If I suck hard enough, will Justin Timberlake come?
Lincoln Village Drive
Rancho Cordova, California
Overheard by: That’s What She Said
Woman: I hate working here. It makes me want to throw my morals out the window, and become a slut.
Co-worker: A slut…There’s an image for you.
Woman: I don’t mean I want to be a slut. I just want to know what all these people are like in bed. No one small, of course.
Co-worker: So you’ll be handing out a questionnaire?
56 59 Junction
Baldwin City, Kansas
Bimbette: I hate that I have to memorize a new date everyday.
Monroe and LaSalle Street
Chicago, Illinois
Asian girl hanging up phone: Why can’t Asian people speak English?!
133 East 13th Street
New York, New York
Cute chick holding up water bottle: Has this water gone bad?
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: only cause i peed in it
Blonde peon #1: My husband just texted me to tell me to turn on my all-wheel drive. He must think I’m an idiot.
Blonde peon #2: Well, it is icy.
Blonde peon #1: I mean, I only have four-wheel drive.
18th and Oak Streets
Kansas City, Missouri
Office girl #1: Is it raining out?
Office girl #2: No way, it’s sunny! Unless it a sun shower.
Office girl #1: A sun shower is not physically possible.
Office girl #2: Ummm, you’ve never seen it rain while the sun’s out?
Office girl #1: Oh, I thought you meant literally, like giant balls of fire falling from the sky…
Michigan
Overheard by:
