Coworker #1: St. Patrick's Day is my favorite holiday. I'm 100% Irish!
Coworker #2: Oh yeah?
Coworker #1: Yeah, especially on my dad's side. He's Irish, Scottish, and Welsh.
Coworker #2: Well, then you're not 100% Irish.
Coworker #1: Yes, I am.
Coworker #2: No, you're not. You're…
Coworker #1: Yes I am. I am 100% Irish.
Coworker #2: Whatever, man.
Coworker #1: The Irish are stubborn, you know.
Phoenix, Arizona
Cube guy #1: Hey, I got that ointment you mentioned last night.
Cube guy #2: Oh yeah, did it go away?
Cube guy #1: Well, you know … It never really “goes away”.
Internet Company
Scottsdale, Arizona
Overheard by: Cube Guru
Large lesbian boss to employee: I'm going to give her a mouthful… Uhm…I mean a…uhm, eyeful, uhm…wait, earful. I'm going to give her an earful.
Phoenix, Arizona
Overheard by: Trying not to picture it
Co-worker: This is the hard part. Yep, it still looks like tomato soup.
5801 South Wintersburg Road
Tonopah, Arizona
Professor: Girls, you have got to stop humping!
University of Arizona
Tucson, Arizona
QA guy #1: So, there’s a bunch of shit going down with the shit. I was going to try and finish that shit, but then all of this shit came up. Can’t they get the shit to work? I mean, get your fucking shit together. You know what I mean?
QA guy #2: I do. I totally do, man. It’s worrisome.
Scottsdale, Arizona
Overheard by: Cube Guru
Innocent-looking receptionist: After he made her cry, again, I told her what I do is just smile. When he's being like that I think about telling him I'm going to claw his eyes out, and I end up smiling.
Coworker, looking impressed: Ooohh, I know that smile. It's your creepy smile, like you're just going to lunge and start eating their faces off.
Sedona, Arizona
Older female coworker to younger female coworker: That's the trouble with eating an apple at your desk, the juice runs down your chin and everywhere.
Tempe, Arizona
Overheard by: James
Coworker to boss: Look at my naked juice! (pause) It's got protein!
Phoenix, Arizona
