…If Barbie's Taught Me Anything, It's That.

Office lady to female coworker: I can't do anything about it because I'm not hung.

Tempe, Arizona

Posted on December 2, 2014
Arizona, Body Parts, Coworkers, Physical Appearance, Sexuality

I Get a Big Raise Every Year, Though

Coworker to colleague: It's so embarrassing…I have to use my teeth.

Tempe, Arizona

Posted on December 1, 2014
Arizona, Body Parts, Coworkers, Sexuality, Weirdness

…By the Women at ASU

Programmer (shouting and thrusting both arms up): Yeah!
Boss: Oh, did you get the stored procedure working?
Programmer: No, Arizona State was voted #1 for hottest women.

Hampton Avenue
Mesa, Arizona

Overheard by: Chris Cardinal

Posted on November 28, 2014
Arizona, Bosses, Compare and contrast, Default, Questions, Sexuality, Tech People, Time Management

I Evidently Received Some Misinformation from the Voices in My Head

File clerk #1: How dare you call me lazy!
File clerk #2: What?
File clerk #1: You said I was lazy on the phone!
File clerk #2: I did not! I said you were crazy! Not lazy!
File clerk #1: Oh, okay, I am sorry!

Phoenix, Arizona

Posted on November 26, 2014
Arizona, Coworkers, General Idiocy, On the phone, Words

Help Me, Champollion, You’re My Only Hope!

Boss: Dude, your plan should be clearly stated on your bill.
Angry employee: Have you seen an ABC Wireless* bill? It’s like the Rosetta Stone fucked a coked-up prostitute and out came my bill.

1440 South Clearview Avenue
Mesa, Arizona

Overheard by: Chris Cardinal

Posted on November 16, 2014
Arizona, Bosses and Underlings, Gripes

Uses Perfect Grammar When Speaking to Himself

Employee, after hanging up with client: That was the most stupidest person I have ever spoke to.

44th Street and Camelback Road
Phoenix, Arizona

Overheard by: Grammatically Offended Boss

Posted on November 5, 2014
Arizona, Dumb Employees, General Idiocy

It Was Supposed to Eliminate Frizz

Bimbette #1: I burned my ear this morning.
Bimbette #2: Oh, on your curling iron?
Bimbette #1: No, with the coffee.

2402 West Beardsley Road
Phoenix, Arizona

Overheard by: InvertedSpear

Posted on October 28, 2014
Arizona, Dumb Employees, Gossip

Bob and Mike Were Never to Meet Face-to-Face

Cubicle drone to loud coworker: You know, Mike*, I can hear you from all the way over here.
Mike*: You know, Bob* I can smell you from all the way over here!

Tempe, Arizona

Overheard by: jane

Posted on October 21, 2014
Arizona, Coworkers, Sensory Experiences, Weirdness

Well, If Hillary Clinton Can Be Jewish…

Coworker #1: St. Patrick's Day is my favorite holiday. I'm 100% Irish!
Coworker #2: Oh yeah?
Coworker #1: Yeah, especially on my dad's side. He's Irish, Scottish, and Welsh.
Coworker #2: Well, then you're not 100% Irish.
Coworker #1: Yes, I am.
Coworker #2: No, you're not. You're…
Coworker #1: Yes I am. I am 100% Irish.
Coworker #2: Whatever, man.
Coworker #1: The Irish are stubborn, you know.

Phoenix, Arizona

Posted on October 3, 2014
Arizona, Compare and contrast, Coworkers, Family, General Idiocy, Holidays

Much Like Workplace TMIs

Cube guy #1: Hey, I got that ointment you mentioned last night.
Cube guy #2: Oh yeah, did it go away?
Cube guy #1: Well, you know … It never really “goes away”.

Internet Company
Scottsdale, Arizona

Overheard by: Cube Guru

Posted on September 29, 2014
Advice, Arizona, Coworkers, Cubicles, Default, Employees, Health & Hygiene, Questions, Service, Words