Boss: No, trust me. The last thing you want to do is bring your spouse on a company Las Vegas trip. You’ll be divorced by the time you get home.
Salesman: Oh, really?
Boss: You know, because of all the drugs… and hookers.
Salesman: Yeah, yeah, that makes sense.
9633 South 48th Street
Phoenix, Arizona
Co-worker #1: What’s the matter?
Co-worker #2: I’m cold.
Co-worker #1: How can you be cold? It’s Friday.
Co-worker #2: …What?
1944 East Sky Harbor Circle
Phoenix, Arizona
Cube rat: Hell, we were finding underwear on top of the refrigerator for two weeks.
400 N 5th Street
Phoenix, Arizona
Overheard by: AndyDan
Peon #1: Oh my god, who wrote “Happy birthday!” in the “Loss of your father” sympathy card?
Peon #2: Clearly it was Lance. Who else is that stupid?
Lance: What did I do? Oh, it's fine, let's just use Wite-Out, he won't know the difference.
Peon #2: Didn't you read the card? Or look at it? It's blue, how's “white” out supposed to fix it?
Lance: What, it's always someone's birthday around here, since when do we do sympathy cards?
Peon #1: Since my grandma died and you wrote “Thanks for all your hard work.”
Arizona
Overheard by: Shocked in AZ
Boss: Hey, maybe we should launch this as an app.
Developer #1 to #2: What is he talking about?
Developer #2: I dunno, that guy's a fool!
Boss to developer #2: I will step on your throat!
Tempe, Arizona
Overheard by: David
Director of sales and marketing baby-talking and hugging his iBook: Some day you’re going to be a dinosaur and no one is going to like you! But not me! No, I love you, little iBook.
401 West Clarendon Avenue
Phoenix, Arizona
Overheard by: reservations monster
Dad: Come on, guys, pick out a gift and let’s go…
Son: I know what we’re giving Mommy.
Younger daughter: A big butt! A really big B-U-T-T!
Barnes & Noble
Glendale, Arizona
Overheard by: Blue Girl In A Red State
Coworker: I can't touch that.
Manager, walking by: Whoah… Let him touch it!
Phoenix, Arizona
Circulation clerk: I was talking to her about how peaceful it is in here, and now she’s going to go get a knife.
1035 North Treat Avenue
Tucson, Arizona
Overheard by: Volks
Sales #1: There’s lint on your shoulder.
Sales #2: Oh.
Sales #1: Here, I’ll pick it off. Wait, here’s Scotch tape; that works better.
Sales #2: I feel like those monkeys that pick bugs off each other’s heads and backs.
712 South Hacienda Drive
Tempe, Arizona
