Female coworker: If we put a bit of vaseline on it he probably could have slid right in!
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: David
Female coworker: If we put a bit of vaseline on it he probably could have slid right in!
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: David
Conferenceperson: Could you please have a pot of coffee ready for my 2 o’clock meeting?
Secretary: Um, there’s a scheduled 1 hour long power outage at 1:30.
Conferenceperson: That’s okay, we have lights.
Computer Science Building
Stony Brook University
Stony Brook, New York
Fashion designer girl #1: I really want a bookshelf, but I don’t have any books.
Fashion designer girl #2: Maybe you could get a short one and paint it white.
8360 Melrose Avenue
West Hollywood, California
IT: Yeah, seems like your floor plate is damaged, you’re going to have to clear your books so they can fix it.
Worker: “Books”? is that like cookies on your computer?
IT: …
4 Times Square
New York, NY
Overheard by: KaotiXX
President yelling at CFO: You eat an elephant one bite at a time, but we're trying to swallow it whole and we're starting with the tusks!
Elmsford, New York
Overheard by: Bored Beyond Belief
Employee #1: Well, you should move to New Jersey. There are great apartments in my complex.
Employee #2: I don’t know that I want to move out there.
Employee #1: The apartments are great, lots of closet space, granite countertops in the kitchen.
Employee #2: I don’t want granite counters. If I fall and hit my head on them, it would hurt.
1 Liberty Plaza
New York, New York
Lawyer on phone to client: They're fuckin' you, Dave*. It's a new way of fucking, but they're fucking you.
Huntington, New York
Overheard by: Lady Lawyer
Intern chick #1: You know, it bothers me going into a store to buy condoms. But I am equally troubled by the idea that even when I buy them online, someone has to physically stuff them into a box with the lube I ordered, and then ship it to my address. And they're there in some warehouse, thinking “Susie's getting laid tonight!”
Intern chick #2: You should look into Xanax.
Rochester, New York
Coworker to another: It's not up to you to do the right thing.
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: anoyed
Sales guy in restroom: You know, if you really want to have fun take the blue pill now.
Darien, Connecticut
Overheard by: is this the matrix or a viagra commercial?
