Boss: I’m getting nailed to the wall here, guys! C’mon! I’m not Jesus Christ! Help me out!
3211 Jermantown Road
Fairfax, Virginia
Overheard by: Genevieve
Boss: I’m getting nailed to the wall here, guys! C’mon! I’m not Jesus Christ! Help me out!
3211 Jermantown Road
Fairfax, Virginia
Overheard by: Genevieve
Employee #1: I waxed my chest last night, and I didn’t have any more tape so I tried using duct tape.
Employee #2, laughing uncontrollably: Wait, wait, wait! I thought the punch line was “I waxed my chest last night”?!
Lynchburg, Virginia
Overheard by: Mike Oxlong
Worker #1: I think there must be something wrong with this phone.
Worker #2: Why?
Worker #1: Every day I check it here and it always goes out at the same time and I can’t get a signal
Worker #2: Do you always use it in the bathroom?
Worker #1: Yeah, I don’t understand why every day at the same it doesn’t work.
Worker #2: Why don’t you take it outside?
He goes outside the bathroom for a couple of minutes and comes back in.
Worker #1: See? I come back in and it’s not working.
Boss in stall: You’re surrounded by two feet of concrete in every direction! The signal can’t penetrate!
2011 Mahone Avenue
Fort Lee Virginia
Overheard by: badford
Female cube dweller: They're livin' on love. That's all Mike* and I had our first year too!
Waynesboro, Virginia
Manager: Where's Mike Love's file? I need Love by 9 o'clock!
Richmond, Virginia
Sales rep #1: It was supposed to be nice this weekend!
Sales rep #2: Nope.
Sales rep #1: What happened?
Sales rep #2: Reality.
Chantilly, Virginia
Cube dweller #1: I just want to make sure we are communicating on this project.
Cube dweller #2: Yeah, we’re communicating. [Yells over cubicles] Hey, Roy*, are we communicating?
Roy: Uh, I’m communicating with my sandwich.
Vienna, Virginia
Overheard by: The Communicator
Boss, with customer on phone, to secretary: Mr Smith* says he doesn't understand this bill you sent him.
Secretary, quietly, from across the room: It isn't complicated, can't he read?
Boss, loudly, next to phone: Yes, he can read!
Winchester, Virginia
Psychiatric nurse, to rest of treatment team, about patient who almost choked: You know Mark*, he sees a big piece of meat, he just puts the whole thing in his mouth.
Catawba, Virginia
Finance clerk: Every time she comes in here, he grabs it and pulls it out, and she runs away.
Vienna, Virginia
Overheard by: Receptionitis