Gumby Was Well-Liked at the Office

Boss, during PowerPoint presentation: We have a sales guy in Houston… Great guy! He'll bend over and do anything for you.

Ottawa
Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: Michael Abraham

Posted on August 24, 2017
Bosses, Canadia, Compliments, Sexuality

You Just Want to See My Ore-O-Face

Coworker, discussing mint Oreos: I stuffed four of them in this morning.
Boss: Can you stuff six?
Coworker: I don't know. Maybe not at once.

Baltimore, Maryland

Posted on August 16, 2017
Bosses, Coworkers, Maryland, Meals and Snacks, Sensory Experiences, Sexuality

Don't Act Like This Isn't in Your Job Description

Editor, about to show tv show to office before lay-off: Okay, are you ready?
Production assistant: Yeah, what am I looking for again?
Editor: Um, Pastease… Ass cracks and nipples.

Chappaqua, New York

Posted on July 24, 2017
Body Parts, Clothes, Employees, New York, Questions, Sexuality, Writers and Editors

Have You Tried Yoga?

Secretary, exasperated: Dennis's thing is just not fitting in my slot properly!

Melville, New York

Posted on June 21, 2017
Admins, Gripes, New York, Sexuality, Words

Bratwurst Stories Would Never Approach the Popularity of Taxicab Confessions

Hot Asian: Why do we have to talk about war shit? Why not talk about our bratwurst stories? I had one with my dad at the county stadium when I was eleven – it was great!

Raleigh, North Carolina

Overheard by: ncarch

Posted on June 6, 2017
Bimbettes, Gripes, Meals and Snacks, Questions, Sexuality

Tim Is the Butt Of Many Office Jokes.

Coworker: What do you need, Tim?
Tim: A reliable tight end.

Minneapolis, Minnesota

Posted on May 30, 2017
Body Parts, Coworkers, Minnesota, Offers and requests, Sexuality

Now Comes the Tricky Part

Cube dweller #1: You just have to insert his name, then you should be able to get it up.
Cube dweller #2: What?!
Cube dweller #3: It would be surprising if she could get it up.
Cube dweller #4: Got it!
Cube dweller #1: She got it up!

Melbourne
Australia

Overheard by: confused but amused

Posted on May 11, 2017
Advice, Australia, Coworkers, Possible Sexual Harassment, Sexuality

That's What You Said About “Manager”!

Female sales rep, about customer: It's not for that douchebag.
Male manager: “Douchebag” is a term usually reserved for men.

Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Not a douchebag

Posted on May 4, 2017
Bosses, Insults, Pennsylvania, Sales, Sexuality, Words

War Veterans Always Win These Contests

Female office worker #1: I had a job stuffing envelopes and it destroyed my cuticles.
Female office worker #2: Yeah, I had one where I had to fold letters all day and I got a ton of paper cuts.
Only male in department: Oh, I have a story about a bloody hand job.

Troy, New York

Overheard by: Sneaker

Posted on April 29, 2017
Body Parts, Coworkers, Default, Health & Hygiene, New York, Sexuality, Words

Cream or Lemon? The Controversy Continues.

Office lady #1: So it's actually a real word?
Office lady #2: Yes, look it up online in urban dictionary. It's a real word.
Office lady #1: But how is it even possible? Is it really like what it sounds?
Office lady #2: Yes, just as you do it in your tea, you do it the same way, that's why it's called “tea bagging.”

Manhattan, New York

Posted on April 2, 2017
Body Parts, Coworkers, Internet, Meals and Snacks, New York, Questions, Sexuality, Words

Sexuality