Coworker, over cubicle wall: That's where I got licked by a marmot.
Provo, Utah
Coworker, over cubicle wall: That's where I got licked by a marmot.
Provo, Utah
Coworker #1: I don't get paying money to play WoW. You're essentially paying for the satisfaction of clicking a button.
Coworker #2: Exactly, that's why I use that money for porn.
Coworker #1: True, at least when you're done with porn you have something to show for it.
Rochester, New York
Overheard by: Rick
Analyst #1: Yeah, I have a meeting with him tomorrow.
Analyst #2: Is he going to give you the golden shower?
Boston, Massachusetts
Receptionist on phone: That's what I'm sayin'. A hooker wouldn't be in flats.
Five Points Station
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: Wearing Sneakers
Interviewer: So, can you drive a multi-position snowplow?
Interviewee: No. But my cousin can.
Department of Transportation
Denver, Colorado
Stylist: I am having bun issues. I called my bun guy and he said I didn't give him enough notice.
Culver City, California
Overheard by: LaLa Land
Manager talking to department: I just really want to thank Katie* for helping out last month. She really jungled a lot of balls…and some of them were pretty hairy.
Richmond, Virginia
Boss on phone, eating cashews: Excuse me, I had a handful of nuts in my hand and put them in my mouth.
Lady on the other end: That's okay.
Boss, with mouth full of cashews: No, it's not, I apologize pitifully.
Louisville, Kentucky
Overheard by: He wasn't sorry
Boss, yelling at employee during conference call: I need to know if this guy is jerking me off or not!
18th St.
New York City, New York
Overheard by: Cill the Obscure
Retail lackey: I am fucking the shit out of this giraffe right now!
Folsom, California
