Worker bee: The easier pencils are to find, the easier they are to steal.
Plymouth, Michigan
Overheard by: Tim
Worker bee: The easier pencils are to find, the easier they are to steal.
Plymouth, Michigan
Overheard by: Tim
Chubby office girl #1: … And I’m a big girl, okay? The wind was blowing so hard that I almost fell over. I dunno how other people stay on the ground.
Chubby office girl #2: I’ve often wondered that.
Chubby office girl #1: Why I’m so fat?
Chubby office girl #2, laughing: No, how skinny people aren’t airborne more often.
Chubby office girl #1: They’re more aerodynamic, I guess.
State Street
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Liz
Coworker: Well, people are essentially like Slinkies…
Lexington, Massachusetts
Overheard by: loves her job
Australian guy: Pardon my language, but my last boss was such a cunt.
Intern: I feel like it’s more acceptable to say the C-bomb when you have an accent.
Spring Street
Oyster Bay, New York
Co-worker: So I was at the deli, and I asked for a third of a pound of meat. I asked the lady twice. She then gave me 1.5 pounds of meat. I said, “Excuse me, this isn’t a third of a pound.” Then she said,
“Yes, it is.” Then I said, “No, it’s not.” So then she turns and asks her co-worker behind the deli counter how much a third of a pound is, and her co-worker replies, “Oh, a third of a pound is .75.”…This is why I hate the South.
115 Perimeter Center Place
Atlanta, Georgia
Producer guy #1: She’s just awful.
Producer guy #2: And it’s not like she’s smokin’ hot!
Producer guy #1: Yeah, if you can’t act at least be smoking hot.
10201 West Pico Boulevard
Los Angeles, California
Guy in next office: I don't believe in marriage. Women just take your money.
Beverly Hills, California
Coworker, in earnest discussion: I think what's more of a concern these days is the complete disintegration of everything.
Croydon
England
Admin to intern: Our lives are not just about the dots. (to other interns) These banks, they get married, change their names… (in baby voice) Have babiiiieeesss.
Exchange Place, New Jersey
HR: What we need to determine about her mistake is, is this fuckup a rare occurrence or is this the type of thing we should come to expect from her.
VP: You mean like the normal run of the mill disasters…
HR: Exactly.
75 Washington Avenue
Portland, Maine
Overheard by: brian brinegar
