Secretary : The guys who clean my yard never take any off my plants, because I threaten them, I say ‘If you touch anything, I’ll kill you!’ And they never touch anything since then. Because they’re Haitians, and you know, Haitians scare easy.
1252 Memorial Drive
Coral Gables, Florida
Exec #1: …Yeah, anybody can own a Louis Vuitton nowadays. You know someone really has money when they can control other people’s time.
Exec #2: Totally.
1212 6th Avenue
New York, NY
IT guy, on computer settings: If it isn’t turned on, then it’s probably turned off.
California
Overheard by: The breakroom
IT manager: How can I be wrong when I don't know what I'm talking about?
College Campus
Huntsville, Texas
Overheard by: Knows what she's talking about
Co-worker on phone: That’s what happens when there are too many chefs and not enough cooks!
465 Main Street
Buffalo, New York
Suit: Why do we have Swiss Miss and Nesquik?
Warehouse guy: Ummm, they’re not the same thing.
Suit: How so? They both make hot chocolate!
Warehouse guy: Well, maybe cause Swiss Miss goes in milk and water?
Suit: So why don’t we just keep this around? It’s a multi-tasking hot chocolate!
Warehouse guy: Huh? Ummm, well, maybe people like the way Nesquik ‘multi-tasks.’ It can be put in cold or hot milk. Good for the summer.
Suit: And this can’t?
Warehouse guy: Dunno. Don’t think so…
Suit: Forget it! I’ll have coffee!
The Boulevard
Norfolk, Virginia
Overheard by: CoffeeJunky
Salesman: You know, customers who want their parts on time and in decent condition really get on my nerves.
8220 England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
Office manager to bookkeeper: If things made sense around here, it wouldn't make sense!
San Carlos, California
Grunt: Can I get those itineraries?
Agent: No, life’s a bitch.
Grunt: Life’s what you make of it, not what it makes of you.
3675 Ruffin Road
San Diego, California
VP Software Development: In my opinion you don’t have to be good at what you do to be a good manager.
2 East Main Street
Danville, Illinois
