Asian girl hanging up phone: Why can’t Asian people speak English?!
133 East 13th Street
New York, New York
Asian girl hanging up phone: Why can’t Asian people speak English?!
133 East 13th Street
New York, New York
Producer on phone with actor she wants to put in taco suit: We’re a little ways from Shakespeare in the Park, I know…
110 Leroy Street
New York, New York
Manager: Because your job can be done more efficiently and less expensively overseas, you are being laid off. However, your particular layoff will be delayed for five months because the work you do on your contract cannot be done overseas. Your projected end date will be 10/31.
Employee: Um, please repeat that, and think about it while you do so.
Manager (after repeating): Oh. Um, sorry.
Upstate New York
Coworker #1: Oh my god, I'm so tired, can we get coffee?
Coworker #2: Sure, I'll just finish this… (phone rings)
Coworker #1, answering phone: Good morning, Melody sleeping!
White Plains, New York
Overheard by: V
Expert Publicist #1: You know what,ya did a shitty job of selling that to the client.
Expert Publicist #2: What’re ya talking about?
Expert Publicist #1: You know, what ya gotta do, ya gotta sell it, ya gotta masturbate his brain.
Expert Publicist #2: What?
Expert Publicist #1: Well if you don’t wanna do it, I’ll masturbate him!
11 Stone Street
New York, NY
Consultant guy: Yeah, we overnight the documents to you. It takes about a week for you to get them.
Garden City, New York
Lawyer on phone: My understanding is that he works in a restaurant, not a bordello.
Huntington, New York
Session Leader: I’ll leave this badge on the desk. If you need to use the facilities, just take it with you and swipe the reader on the bathroom door.
Participant #1: You need to swipe from the bottom up, right?
Participant #2: Not if you’re a girl!
One Chase Plaza
New York, NY
Patron: Will the bank will be open on Friday?
Teller: Yes sir, we are open. Why shouldn't we be?
Patron: I heard it will be very cold Thursday and Friday.
Teller: No sir, we don't close the bank due to cold weather. How can I help you?
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Eddie
Male coworker #1: Sorry, dude, I was trying to throw something at your D, and I missed.
Male coworker #2 (angrily): Why are you always trying to throw things at my dick?
New York City, New York
Overheard by: Thank God I don't have a D…
