COO: Hey, Dave*! Larry* just called.
VP: Really, how's he doing?
COO: He said to make sure when I see you to say, “Fuck you, Dave*!”
Miami, Florida
Overheard by: UN Reject
COO: Hey, Dave*! Larry* just called.
VP: Really, how's he doing?
COO: He said to make sure when I see you to say, “Fuck you, Dave*!”
Miami, Florida
Overheard by: UN Reject
Boss: So, your voicemail kicked me off because my message was too short. I can understand it cutting you off if you start in on a monologue, but what if you just want to leave a message saying, ‘Fuck you’?
Rockefeller University
New York, New York
Overheard by: Molly the Mole
Red-faced manager: Frozen again! God fucking dammit! Jesus fucking Christ! I'm getting really fucking pissed off at this motherfucking computer!
Nonchalant passerby: Kick it, then.
Plymouth, Michigan
Older dude: You know, you shouldn’t bite your nails.
Executive assistant: You shouldn’t be a drunk.
45 West Portal Avenue
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Jerkey
Manager: Can you gather up the other guys? We have to move a bunch of stuff.
Employee: Fuck you.
Manager: What did you just say to me?
Employee: Fuck you, asshole.
Manager: Are you nuts?
Employee: Fuck you, bitch.
Manager: You’re fired. Get out of here.
Employee: I wasn’t clocked in. You can’t fire me.
Manager walks to computer, clocks him in, says, ‘You’re fired,’ and then clocks him out.
Employee: That’s so unfair.
Circle Centre Mall
Overheard by: Shatmandu
Cube dweller #1: Sometimes I think I am only here for comic relief!
Cube dweller #2: If that's you're role, then why am I here?
Cube dweller #1: You're my muse, bitch!
Markham
Ontario
Canadia
Suit #1: Dude, I just looked at the girl from last night’s MySpace page. Tell me again why you didn’t fuck her?
Suit #2: She has birds!
Suit #1: Good enough.
St. Paul, Minnesota
Overheard by: Jordan
Tech support girl: So, what should I tell them? They say their internet is slow.
Tech support supervisor: Tell them to suck my big brown dick.
Ontario
Canadia
Overpaid receptionist: I am so freakin’ tired. I’ve been actually having sex since four o’clock Saturday ’til six o’clock this morning.
Coworker: Ummm, that’s nice.
Overpaid receptionist: I’m so sore. I am walking like Sally*. It looks like she was fucked all weekend, but all she did was pull weeds.
North O’Connor Boulevard
Las Colinas, Texas
Overheard by: So that’s what ‘being rode hard and put away wet’ looks like
