Insults

VP: God! They’ve got you working reception? We must be really scraping the bottom of the barrel.

5203 Leesburg Pike
Falls Church, Virginia

Boss: I don't know if it's because she was black, and I'm not used to hiring black people, but I just didn't get a good feeling from her.
Sales guy: Yeah, plus, her eyes were kind of red.
Boss: A black alcoholic. That's just what we need.

Los Angeles, California

Boss: Oh you fucking idiot!
Pause
Boss: Why don’t you just go home, you wanker!
Boss walks out of the office.
Employee: Who are you yelling at?
Boss: Me, I’m going home!

301 Pirie Street
Adelaide, Australia

Overheard by: Jessica

Supervisor: I hate Jane Murray* with such glee, my hate for her actually brings me joy.

Manahawkin, New Jersey

Male cubicle dweller to another: Good Lord, we have a crackhead in the NASCAR!

Battle Creek, Michigan

Girl: Can you keep this desk clean?
Guy: What? The desk is clean. Stop hating!
Girl: Hey, hey, don’t say that, I’m not a cock-blocker. I don’t cock-block.
Guy: What the fuck does that have to do with my desk?

350 South Figueroa
Los Angeles, California

Overheard by: Sexual tension in the workplace?

Employee #1: It's okay, don't worry about it. Carmen is gonna get them eventually.
(long pause)
Employee #2: It's “karma,” dumbass!

Hawthorne, California

Overheard by: thanks, carmen.

Guy coworker: So I know after they've wiped out the rest of my truck, these thieves are thinking, “We can even steal these $3 sunglasses and pawn them for at least a portion of a rock!”
Girl coworker: Rocks are free, dumbass!

Lewisville, Texas

Overheard by: entertained by others' ignorance

Office girl commenting on CEO’s haircut: What happened to her?
Queer coworker: I know! It looks like something they created for Star Wars and then rejected: ‘Ewww, too ugly!’

701 G Street
Washington, DC

Man: It’s not my fault the guy was a fucking idiot… It may have been my fault that I told him, though.

New Street Station
Birmingham
United Kingdom

Overheard by: I would have told him, too