Customer: I have not ordered this product.
Service person: But we have a contract that you have signed.
Customer: How do you think it feels if I rape you in your ass every month?
Service person: I’m sorry?
Customer: How do you think it feels if I rape you in your ass every month?
Service person: Would you do it like a gentleman?
Potsdam, Germany
Customer service clerk #1: Whew! It stinks in here. Did the bug exterminator guy spray for bugs in here today?
Customer service clerk #2: No, one of the sales reps just walked through. You are smelling salesman cologne.
5760 East Highway 80
Pearl, Mississippi
Overheard by: Brain Dancing
Engineer #1: You don’t understand…the program’s got unresolved
symbols that won’t work.
Engineer#2: Yeah, I got 2 unresolved symbols for you right here.
8000 West Sunrise Boulevard
Plantation, Florida
Boss: This subcontractor really chaps my butt.
Senior VP: Is it a good butt chapping or a bad chapping?
Boss: Bad.
Senior VP: Glad to know there’s a differnce.
812 Moorefield Park
Richmond, Virginia
Office assistant #1: Lisa goes to lunch everyday at he same time. I wonder where she goes, I don't see how she affords to eat out on a daily basis, considering we don't get paid that much. I bring my lunch and eat at my desk because I just can't do it.
Office assistant #2: Uh-huh.
Office assistant #1: I just don't know where she goes.
Government Center
Charlotte, North Carolina
Worker #1: This has high-fructose corn syrup.
Worker #2: So you’re drinking colored sugar water.
Worker #1: This doesn’t even contain water.
Worker #2: What’s the first ingredient?
Worker #1: Oh.
1 Liberty Plaza
New York, NY
Lady on phone: He’s going to the baby shower? Holy shit. I know he’s gay, but he has a penis.
825 7th Avenue
New York, New York
Overheard by: Tami D’Intern
Coworker to self: I can’t perpetuate this freak show.
West Superior Street
Chicago, Illinois
PR exec #1: I just heard he's coming to the meeting tomorrow, after all.
PR exec #2: So he's sick of the person from his basement, then?
London
Ontario
Canadia
Employee: I just flew in from Spain yesterday, I’m totally jetlagged.
Department head: Spain? Is that in a different time zone?
4220 N. St. Louis Avenue
Chicago, Illinois
