Teacher: Okay, so now that you know the basic rules of the computer lab, I have to ask you one more question… Do any of you ever check out the NMBLA website? [Silence.] Well I do, frequently. I want to know who the enemy is. Also, I like to look at the new Russian brides on Fridays.
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Cupcake1
Assistant: I went to the grocery store this past weekend. Do you know my kids drank five two-liters of Pepsi since then? Three and a half kids drank five bottles of Pepsi.
Sales guy: What’d you do with the other half a kid? … That must have been awful!
8220 England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
Supervisor #1: Did one of you guys grab my obituary off the printer?
Employee: You’re dead?
Supervisor #2: Let’s go see if she has anything good on her desk.
19th Street and Douglas Street
Iowa
Overheard by: Lloyd
New admin asst: Where can I find this address?
Office manager: I usually just google the company name and get it from their website.
New admin asst: You what?
Office manager: I look it up on google.
New admin asst: What's google?
Santa Anita Arcadia, California
Woman on phone: 4, 5, 3, P as in Peter, T as in Tom, Q as in…Cuba.
3350 Tillamook Street
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: Carrie Cole
Male coworker: I heard you failed your test.
Female coworker: I didn't really fail. I just got like a really, really low score.
Houston, Texas
Accounting Clerk on phone: I’m sorry, she no longer works here. Could I take a message?
3850 Three Mile Lane
McMinnville, Oregon
Employee #1: Is [Morgan] a man?
Employee #2: What do you mean?
Employee #1: Is [Morgan] a he or a she?
1559 Brunswick Street
Halifax, Nova Scotia
Canadia
Admin: I’ve always wondered what the metric system was.
Admin: I’m going to go home before I have a massive exploding in my head or something of that nature.
Admin: I’m just going to cut out my bladder. ’cause I’m getting really tired of having to go to the bathroom.
Admin: The mail leaves our office from our office at five o’clock and from there it goes to the post office. Then it goes to the post office in california before it gets to your guyses mailbox. So I wanna say that possibly it should probably get there today, I wanna hope so.
121 SW Salmon Street
Portland, Oregon
Coworker: I’m not gonna be no teacher.
1225 Warren Street
St. Louis, Missouri
