Boss: So, I can’t take more than one piece of hand luggage on board?
Coworker: That’s right.
Boss: And this is all because of 7-11?
Coworker: Ummm, do you mean 9-11?
Kent
England
Boss: So, I can’t take more than one piece of hand luggage on board?
Coworker: That’s right.
Boss: And this is all because of 7-11?
Coworker: Ummm, do you mean 9-11?
Kent
England
New department secretary: Is it okay to type when the screen is black?
Bank of America
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: rosa who else
Office Manager: …who knows, maybe Crystal is a very nice person.
Design Assistant: But I hate people named after rocks.
228 Gerrard Street East
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: J.B.
Reporter #1: So, I was interviewing her about what she was going to do next, and she said she hoped she’d just get, you know, a Joe Blow job.
Reporter #2: You’re not going to put that in the story, are you?
Reporter #3: Where can I find this Joe?
149 Penn Avenue
Scranton, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: I just work here
50-ish coworker: Oh, ‘Shelly’… I thought it said her name was Shirley Temple. You know who Shirley Temple is?
20-ish coworker: Wasn’t she the detective who went around solving crimes? No, wait, that’s Sherlock Holmes.
31 Chambers Street
New York, New York
CEO: Guys, guys–no monkeys, we're calling the White House.
New York City, New York
Processor: Can I have the Human Resources Department please?
Young receptionist: Human resources?
Processor: Yeah. Personnel, human resources..
Young receptionist: I think you have the wrong number, you need to call the hospital for that. (hangs up)
Lake Katrine, New York
Judge: So what does your wife do for a living?
Potential juror: Nothing.
Judge: She does nothing?
Potential juror: Nope.
Judge: Do you have kids?
Potential juror: Yes.
Judge: Yeah, she does “nothing”.
265 East 161st Street
Bronx, New York
Overheard by: John
Senior Manager: [Justine] just asked me if you heard from the Miami system about the problem we had on Friday afternoon.
Manager: No. They were preparing for Wilma to hit them…oh, about now.
1400 Walnut Street
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
CSR: Customer Service, this is Sheri*. May I have your account number please?
Customer: Why is my account negative?!
CSR: Well, if you give me your account number, I can look it up and go over your transactions with you.
Customer gives information, CSR verifies, and the conversation continues.
CSR: Well, ma’am, looks like your opening deposit on Tuesday was 25 dollars… And then you withdrew 40 dollars from the ATM on Friday.
Customer: And…?
CSR: Well, 25 dollars minus 40 dollars is negative 15 dollars.
Customer: I don’t understand what you are trying to tell me.
Minneapolis, Minnesota
