Co-Worker: My cousin died in a car accident yesterday.
Boss: Oh, I’m sorry.
Co-Worker: Yeah. The funeral is Saturday in St. Louis.
Boss: Will you be going?
Co-Worker: Oh no! That’s not enough time for me to get everything around and make it down there! I mean, maybe if they had given me a week’s notice…
Olentangy River Road
Columbus, Ohio
Worker: Hey, it’s Friday! You should go drink something in the lounge before you leave. Almost everyone’s in a meeting. I’ve already had two beers.
Intern: Haha, um… I’m actually underage.
Worker: Oh, who cares?
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: not in meeting
Boss: What about those materials needing to be sent out to our components?
Co-worker: Oh, I threw them in a box and shoved it under my chair. They were taking up too much room on my desk.
5205 Leesburg Pike
Falls Church, Virginia
Blonde receptionist: Do you have any Krazy Glue?
Paralegal: I don’t think so. Why?
Blonde receptionist: My tooth fell out.
Paralegal: I think you need to see a dentist.
Blonde receptionist: No, my teeth are always falling out and I just Krazy Glue them back in.
Paralegal: Krazy Glue? Maybe that’s why you’ve been getting all those headaches…
Blonde receptionist: No, that’s because I quit smoking back in February.
Law office
Great Neck, New York
Overheard by: Big Larry
Co-worker #1: Man! Sasha* is on the phone every time I go over there to talk to her.
Co-worker #2: Yeah, you’re right! She is! You know who else is on the phone a lot? Latoya*.
Co-worker #1: … She’s the receptionist…
Tysons Corner, Virginia
Marketing guy: Why haven’t you kept me up to date on this account?
Ops guy: I’ve CC-ed you on every email I sent to them.
Marketing guy: I don’t have time to read my emails. There’s too much information in them. If you send me an important email give me a call to let me know I need to check it.
1700 Research Boulevard
Rockville, Maryland
Overheard by: Septimus
Old Australian man trying to flirt with young female barista: Remember back in the old ages when we could burn women at the stake? That was lovely!
Young female barista: Hahaha!
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: jerry
Executive assistant: I think I touch and smell just about everything.
141 River’s Edge Drive
Traverse City, Michigan
Overheard by: Another Assistant
Female cubicle-dweller: Good news! Remember that smell I kept smelling but couldn’t find? That garbage smell? It was me!
1009 Lenox Drive
Lawrenceville, New Jersey
Office drone to receptionist: Debbie asked me to make sure her wieners didn't get too hot, and that meant I had to touch them!
Denver, Colorado
