18-year-old guy: How old do you think Brenda* [older lady from office] is?
20-year-old guy: About… fifty two?
18-year-old guy: I’d hate to be that old and still wear make-up.
Willenhall
West Midlands
England
18-year-old guy: How old do you think Brenda* [older lady from office] is?
20-year-old guy: About… fifty two?
18-year-old guy: I’d hate to be that old and still wear make-up.
Willenhall
West Midlands
England
Receptionist: You guys.
Co-worker #1: How old are you today?
Co-worker #2: Hell, if her skin is anything like the rings of a tree…
Office: …
Co-worker #2: What?
1490 Francis Drive
Daytona Beach, Florida
Office guy #1: Does anyone know of, like, a Mexican dessert?
Office guy #2: Why?
Office guy #1: Oh, my wife is having a Mexican-themed party and I have to think of a dessert.
Office guy #3: Flan? I think that is Mexican. I don’t know what it is, though…
Office gal: Flan is nasty. It has a nasty texture. Flan is like the texture of a rotten cooter.
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Overheard by: I don’t like flan either…
Guy in jeans and flip flops walks into office at 11 a.m. and high-fives two employees on the way.
Newbie in suit: Dude, he’s totally pulling an Office Space. We better watch him — he might set the building on fire. Or start gutting fish at his desk.
Cube dweller: Okay, first of all, that was Milton who set the building on fire, not Peter Gibbons. Second, it’s Casual Friday, which is probably why he’s dressed like that. And third, he doesn’t work here.
Insurance office
Long Island, New York
Hippie coworker: I was hoping to get sick today, but nothing happened. I didn't want to go into work.
Boston, Massachusetts
Salesman #1: So, you put your hand in?
Salesman #2: Yeah, well, I tried. At first I could only get my fingers in there, and there’s water and this black shit drippin’ out.
Salesman #1: Gross… Totally gross.
Salesman #2: It was… And she’s yelling at me that I’m doing it wrong, but I’m just trying to work my whole hand in there and she won’t shut up!
Neighboring cube rat: Keep your gross-ass sex stories to yo’self!
Salesman #2: I was working on the clogged plumbing at my mother’s house!
Equitable building
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Drue K.
Female coworker: First, let me choke a bear…
1250 Broadway
New York, New York
Young museum volunteer: And I had to listen to the other kids talking about masturbation for an hour.
Museum employee: Yuck. You’re probably the sanest person in your school.
Young museum volunteer: I know! I wish I could just… stab them all in the neck.
Kellogg Avenue
St. Paul, Minnesota
Office girl #1: I like your ring!
Office girl #2: I love this ring! I wish it had super powers! Sometimes I wanna lick it, like a Ring Pop!
Evans, Colorado
Overheard by: Liaison
