Coworker #1: Dammit! I hate being poisoned!
Coworker #2: You know, something tells me that you aren’t doing paperwork.
460 Canning Highway
Perth, Australia
Coworker #1: Dammit! I hate being poisoned!
Coworker #2: You know, something tells me that you aren’t doing paperwork.
460 Canning Highway
Perth, Australia
White dude to black coworker: The cool thing about Obama is that he is able to transcend race. He’s the ultimate embodiment of American multiculturalism and pluralism. He’s white and black, and his race doesn’t matter, he’s got character, which was Martin Luther King’s dream, that people would be judged according to the content of their character, not the color of their skin.
White dude #2: Yeah, well, I just can’t wait until Obama gets into office and he invites MTV over to the White House to film an episode of Cribs and he’s got a stripper pole in the basement right by his poster of Scarface.
130th Street
Tacoma, Washington
Overheard by: Stan Green
Co-worker #1: Is cheesecake a cake or a pie?
Co-worker #2: Hmm…good question. I think it’s pie, ’cause it’s got a crust.
5900 Wilshire Boulevard
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: Afshin
Loudest woman in the office on phone: I do not want chow mein. Can you hear me now? I do not want chow mein.
Burbank, California
Coworker #1 to vendor carrying box out door: Dick, are you coming back in?
Coworker #2: That's what he does, he comes in, he goes out, he comes in, he goes out, all day long.
Coworker #3: Don't you think that gets old after a while?
Coworker #2: What? I'm telling the truth. Dick comes in, dick goes out, he comes in and goes out.
Coworker #1: What grade are you in? Third?
Coworker #2: I wasn't saying anything that wasn't true. It's not my fault you guys have dirty minds. Dick comes in and goes out a lot, all day long.
Connecticut
Overheard by: omfg, he's so annoying
Co-worker slams down the phone and says: Okay, it’s official, you have to be retarded to work in our accounting office.
187 Madison Avenue
New York, NY
Overheard by: Janet
Assistant on phone: Hey [Lindsay], my little dancing queen, I had a great time last night…Hope you did, too…
Co-worker: He’s always so vocal the day after he’s gotten laid.
640 5th Avenue
New York, NY
Waiter #1: My cherry popped in my mouth.
Waiter #2: That's what she said.
British Columbia
Canadia
Coworker #1: Can you do me a favor?
Coworker #2: Depends. What is it?
Coworker #1: Can you use your vagina to get me a day off?
Brooklyn, New York
Overheard by: Liz
Woman on phone: How did they pull it out? Did they cut you open or go up your butt-hole?
University Place
New York, New York
