Attorney to older male clerk: Remember, they have to be issued before April!
Female paralegal to older male clerk: You're gonna have to show cleavage at the court!
Older male clerk: I tried that once; they took eight weeks!
Female legal assistant, muttering: There's your mental image for the rest of the day!
Law Offices
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Cubed Up Nearby
Worker #1: So did I answer your question?
Worker #2: No, but you entertained me.
242 West 36th Street
New York, NY
Office bimbette: Did you use your new pen yet? Did you smell it?
Broadway
New York City, New York
Office peon: When I was little I Dream of Jeannie always made me tense. I think it was the chaos.
25 South Front Street
Columbus, Ohio
Overheard by: emf
Male employee: Oh, I’m sorry. I could’ve scared you and you could’ve fallen.
Female employee sitting in an open, screenless window: That’s okay, you didn’t scare me.
Male employee: You look like you’re going to jump. Please don’t jump out the window. We really need someone to answer the phones.
98th Street and West End
New York, New York
Overheard by: adrienne
Coworker: I think he’s on crack. I mean, in a good way. I just think he’s on crack.
1901 West University
Tempe, Arizona
Girl #1: I feel like I'm pregnant.
Girl #2: Maybe you are.
Girl #1: But, it was anal sex.
Girl #2: But I think it could still pass through.
Girl #1: “Pass through?”
Girl #2: Yeah, I think sometimes it can.
Girl #1: Oh god.
Girl #2: I think I've heard it could. You'd better go get checked out.
Girl #1: Oh, god!
Girl #2: You're even looking kind of…bigger.
Illinois
Cashier #1: Tony was in here buying cigarettes, too.
Cashier #2: Oh, really? Tony smokes?
Cashier #3: Yeah… like a fish!
Westport Plaza Creve
Couer, Missouri
Office peon #1: Last night I had a dream about being attacked by a donkey.
Office peon #2: Oh, I know what your mean: zebras are my Freddy Krueger.
Office peon #1: I know, right? Because they don't even sound like regular fucking horses.
Office peon #2: And they're camouflaged like lightning!
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: Best Nature Documentary EVER!
Worker #1: Today was like International Day at McDonalds this morning. Not one person spoke with a Midwest accent…I was gonna be like, “Oh, they are so fucking up my breakfast.”
Worker #2: Did you hear that there are more terrorists in Ohio?
Worker #1: Yeah? First they want to blow up our malls here in the city, now kill the President. They are always in Ohio. You never hear about them in like, Montana. That’s where the Nazis are.
Worker #3: Yeah, the terrorists are up there on the 4th floor…You should go up there.
Worker #2: I’m not going up there.
Worker #1: They do have a nice floor up there.
1 Easton Oval
Columbus, Ohio
