Coworker #1: I'm not really a reality tv fan, but you know what show I really enjoy and gets to me?
Coworker #2: Which one?
Coworker #1: Tool academy.
Stamford, Connecticut
Coworker #1: I'm not really a reality tv fan, but you know what show I really enjoy and gets to me?
Coworker #2: Which one?
Coworker #1: Tool academy.
Stamford, Connecticut
Boss on phone: I know! I'm like a freakin' unicorn today.
Manhattan, New York
Manager to employee: Even with a few billion dollars, I think that a gay Jew would have a bit of trouble getting elected pope.
Employee: They picked a Nazi last time.
Manager: Well, yes, but even a Nazi is better than a gay Jew.
Employee: I have a bumper sticker that says that.
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Director: How was your vacation?
African American employee: It was good.
Director: You're so dark you can lay in the sun for two minutes, then hang at the Tiki bar all day.
Park Ridge, New Jersey
Overheard by: Lucy
Melancholy sales rep: There was a time when drunk chicks were okay. Not anymore.
Raleigh, North Carolina
Coworker to another who has just put basket on his head: It's like you're playing “Amish tron” or something…
Hollywood, California
Overheard by: scrapes
Sales guy #1: What the hell is that? Is that where you keep your change?
Sales guy #2: Yep.
Sales guy #1: I was like, “what kind of horse pills are you on?”
Sales guy #2: It's my anal suppositories.
Sales guy #1: Dude, I'm like a porn star. I make anal depositories! Recognize!
Bonner Springs, Kansas
Boss to peon: I think you should be in charge of figuring this out so we can blame you if it all blows up.
Peon: I'm not really comfortable with that approach.
Boss: I think you should learn to work with a lesser degree of comfort.
Washington, DC
Manager: Yeah, I called the bank to get our change ready, but half the time you call them and it's not ready when we get there!
Coworker: Isn't that like what we do, though?
Pizza Place
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: Lola
Workaholic, exiting a meeting: It's less about zombies than you'd think.
St. Louis, Missouri
