Receptionist, after leaving bathroom: I didn't fart or shit, but my piss smells like a mariachi band.
Exton, Pennsylvania
Receptionist, after leaving bathroom: I didn't fart or shit, but my piss smells like a mariachi band.
Exton, Pennsylvania
Office lady #1: I got porn in my e-mail again! I just opened it up and…whoa! Big surprise!
Office lady #2: How big a surprise?
Markham
Ontario
Canadia
Dispatcher: Don’t take it personally. You gave me the finger, I gave you the tongue.
Salt Lake, Utah
Boss to underling: When I told you that you smelled like bacon grease, it was a compliment!
Mountain View, Wyoming
Overheard by: Meagan
Portly IT guy on phone: That's almost as bad as my cousin kicking a dead man in the head and breaking his jaw.
Jacksonville, Florida
Clueless coworker, holding up bracelet she found at H&M: The store is exactly like Forever 21.
Patienceless coworker, raising eyebrows: No. It's not… at all! Not even remotely.
Clueless coworker: Well, it's kinda sorta similar in some ways.
Sacramento, California
Intern #1: I work for Toyota. I don't work for Japan.
Intern #2: Aren't they the same thing?
Washington, DC
Male security guard: You know, it sounded like a thousand golden angels gargling with melted butter.
Female security guard: More like explosive diarrhea.
Lincoln, Nebraska
Colleague on phone: No, no, no. No! I'm gonna ask you, like Tina Turner asked Ike: What's love got to do with this, baby?
Fordham University
New York
Assistant director walking through door: Ugh, what is that smell?
Female worker popping popcorn: If it smells like fish, that's Tasha*.
Beckley, West Virginia
