Client: I used to know a girl in school that always played with my hair… She was always messin’ with my hair.
Hairdresser: Do you know what happened to her? Maybe she became a hairstylist?
Client: Oh no… I doubt it… She was really smart.
Hair Salon
Brooklyn, New York
Overheard by: ColorMeFabulous
Guy #1: You know what's a bad way to go? Velociraptors.
Guy #2: I'm not afraid of them anymore. I'd say the T-Rex is worse.
Guy #1: Come on–everybody chooses the man-eating tiger.
Guy #2: Or ape.
(pause)
Guy #1: I wouldn't mind working on a farm.
Victoria
BC
Canadia
Casting assistant: …I mean… If you’re not going to type your letter, you might want to make sure that your handwriting doesn’t make you look like a serial killer.
Diamond Street
Brooklyn, New York
Overheard by: Tigertail
Manager #1 to manager #2: I’m talking about sloppy joes and you’re talking about sucking toes.
Cordele, Georgia
Overheard by: Marisa Griggs
Executive director, discussing clients: We can't touch them physically, but we can touch them with things.
Louisville, Kentucky
CEO to receptionist: I’m not touching myself! I’m having an underwear emergency.
Parnell
Auckland
New Zealand
Boss to office: It's like being on Wheel of Fortune without having to buy a vowel.
Chicago, Illinois
Sales girl: We have a sale on sports bras!
Largely endowed woman: I can't wear sports bras. They make me look like I have a uniboob.
Texas
Overheard by: silentinthecorner
Coworker, eating lunch: Ew, this yogurt tastes like sweaters!
Melbourne, Florida
Yuppie analyst #1: Dude, that girl you took home last night was maybe a 3.
Yuppie analyst #2: I mean…it was my birthday, I had way too much to drink, I… (pauses) You're right…no excuses…she was a total farm animal.
New York City, New York
