Director to room full of environmentalists: Well, I know I already shot my wad…
Sacramento, California
Overheard by: Erin
Director to room full of environmentalists: Well, I know I already shot my wad…
Sacramento, California
Overheard by: Erin
Coworker to another who has just put basket on his head: It's like you're playing “Amish tron” or something…
Hollywood, California
Overheard by: scrapes
Disgruntled middle aged CSR, answering phone: Hello. (pause) Oh, just at this stupid meaningless job. How are you?
Aliso Viejo, California
Cubicle worker #1: I was just next to what I commonly refer to as a “master blaster” in the men's john a minute ago…
Cubicle worker #2: Go on…
Cubicle worker #1: I think he barely had a chance to get his pants down before the gates of hell opened and all were consumed with fire and explosions of various forms…
Cubicle worker #1: I was trying not to laugh in the stall next door.
Cubicle worker #2: What the fuck!
Cubicle worker #1: It just goes to show. No matter how nice a person's shoes, they can still be ugly on the inside. His shoes were very nice, after all. A black patent leather cap toe, I believe.
Cubicle worker #2: Everyone shits.
Cubicle worker #1: I didn't get too good a look in my haste to retreat, lest I have to endure uncomfortable eye contact subsequently.
Moreno Valley, California
Overheard by: Joe P
Female office worker: I'll take care of it. I have great attention to detail, I'm very anal retentive about that sort of thing. Anytime you want anal, I'm your girl.
(15 seconds of silence) I think that came out wrong. You know what I meant, right?
Boss: Well, okay, team, looks like we have that one assigned. Moving on…
Anaheim, California
Manager on the phone: I'm carrying the shoulders of five people on my back.
Pomona, California
Overheard by: Rather confused
Coworker #1: What should I name my font?
Coworker #2: What about Kont?
Coworker #1: Ew!
Coworker #2: What? Oh, “Kont” sounds like” cunt.”
Coworker #1: That just happened. Gross!
California
Overheard by: g$
Disney peon #1, discussing Jonas Brothers project: “You've just been Jo-Bro'd” sounds so obscene.
Disney peon #2: Yeah, and the tag line is, “packed with more Jonas than you've ever seen.”
(ten minutes later)
Disney peon #3, walking up: I feel like my brain is running out my ears.
Disney peons #1 & #2: You've just been Jo-Bro'd!
Burbank, California
Middle-aged coworker, about applying makeup to upper eyelids: I can't do it because my eyes are all squinty.
Young Asian coworker, jokingly: Yeah, me either.
Middle-aged coworker, serious: But that's because of where you're from.
Male coworker, walking in: Oxnard?
Thousand Oaks, California
Middle aged CSR #1: Am I flashing or is it hot in here?
Middle aged CSR #2: It's not just you. I'm totally flashing, like a retard!
20-something CSR, laughing: You're flashing like a what?
Middle aged CSR #2: A retard. You know… Like those people who have nothing on underneath their trench coats, and they flash people. You know, those crazy people.
Aliso Viejo, California
