Head of HR: I bet you he’s [the COO] a total virgin. Probably even a hand virgin.
402 Pacific Avenue
San Francisco, California
Head of HR: I bet you he’s [the COO] a total virgin. Probably even a hand virgin.
402 Pacific Avenue
San Francisco, California
Eastern European cocktail waitress: So what is this “stepping up to the plate” you spoke of in our meeting?
Bar manager: It’s an analogy…OK, it’s like this: in baseball, you step into the batter’s box. You step up to the plate to try and hit a home run. That’s what we need, is home runs here.
Eastern European cocktail waitress: I don’t understand your speech at all.
Bar manager: Great! Now I’m going to have to explain what an analogy is.
Bourbon Street Casino
120 E. Flamingo Boulevard
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: KellyMarie
Program Manager: Dude! You know that one tech writer, that one chick?
Engineer: Yeah, the older one? She’s a nice person.
Program Manager: Yeah, I know. Man, sometimes she gets like this massive camel-toe.
Engineer: Dude, you need whisper those kinds of things.
Program Manager: But man, you could measure it in inches! Oh shit, here she comes.
She walks by. The Program Manager follows her, turns around seconds later and gives the split finger sign.
41311 Vincenti Court
Novi, Michigan
Boss: He can’t talk to me like I’m his little brother. He needs to act like it’s God on the phone.
159 Jackson Road
Berlin, New Jersey
Overheard by: R. Collins
Consultant: So what is this meeting about, anyway?
Boss: Why is everyone so concerned about this meeting?
Consultant: Well, for starters it’s 3 hours long–
Boss: Don’t worry, we can’t fire all of you…
595 Madison Street
New York, NY
Overheard by: Trouble
Boss: Hey, you guys! We’re supposed to be a team. I think we should take a vote on the grimy chicken.
550 Bowie Street
Austin, Texas
Safety Manager: Uncooked chicken is just…foul!
5409 N. Florida Avenue
Tampa, Florida
Overheard by: Julia
Boss: It’s my job to eavesdrop on people. That’s why I like to talk really loud, so that when it’s quiet people think I’m not here.
Schofield Barracks
Hawaii
Manager: These trainees are useless; they’re just like fungus, and they itch!
Postal Code 112
Ruwi, Oman
Suit #1: So it’s a formalization of a process management control?
Suit #2: Well, I wouldn’t say “control” but yes.
200 Hudson Street
New York, NY
