Manager: Ow, shit shit fuck shit.
Peon: What’s wrong?
Manager: I accidentally ironed my arm this morning, and now it hurts every time I touch anything with it.
1180 Jefferson Road
Rochester, New York
Overheard by: Cube Farm Worker #5823457
Manager: Ow, shit shit fuck shit.
Peon: What’s wrong?
Manager: I accidentally ironed my arm this morning, and now it hurts every time I touch anything with it.
1180 Jefferson Road
Rochester, New York
Overheard by: Cube Farm Worker #5823457
Manager, about getting her nails done: I wanna get just the tip red, I see lots of girls with the tip.
Annoying coworker: Just the tip?
Coworker: Wanna play a game called “just the tip”? Just for a second, to see how it feels.
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Can we go crash a wedding now?
(sound of whip cracking)
Next cubicle coworker: Ahh, my eye!
Mission Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Ian
Coworker #1: I wasn't that drunk by that point. I mean, I was sober enough to realize that they were branding each other's asses with Christmas cookie cutters.
Boss: Sure…
Coworker #1: No, legit. Sticking the cookie cutters in the fire and branding each other's asses.
Coworker #2: Can you imagine shacking up with someone with an inverted Christmas pointing right to your pooper?
Hicksville, New York
Overheard by: Traumatized
IT server guy on cell: Yeah, it'll get really huge, and it'll stay like that for awhile…
Santa Clara, California
Overheard by: braingauis
Female worker, returning from bathroom: I peeked in the crack a little to see if it was occupied, and I accidentally saw vagina.
Male worker: Accidental vagina is why I failed my freshman year of college.
Marlborough, Massachusetts
Female sales rep #1, sneezing loudly: What is going on in here? I got it all in my nose.
Female sales rep #2, coughs loudly: Well, I got it all in my throat.
Delran, New Jersey
Overheard by: Bruce Banner
Coworker in kitchen #1: Have you always had the problem, or have you changed you routine lately?
Coworker in kitchen #2: No, but I am on my knees a lot.
Marblehead, Massachusetts
Seaman, next to air force guys: I love Dick's! (pause) The restaurant, that is.
Airman: We always knew there was something about you seamen.
San Antonio, Texas
Overheard by: I like them too.
Co-worker, complaining about his chapped lips: These chapped lips really suck big dick.
The Arboretum
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: El Gato
