Cube monkey girl: I don't have any gray hairs on my head, but I have a gray patch down there.
Male coworker: Those are cobwebs, not gray hairs.
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: Sex Writer Goddess
Cube monkey girl: I don't have any gray hairs on my head, but I have a gray patch down there.
Male coworker: Those are cobwebs, not gray hairs.
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: Sex Writer Goddess
Office girl on phone: I finally found out why my hamsters aren't fucking! I have three girls!
Denham Springs, Louisiana
Overheard by: Erin
CCA #1: The client says his squirrel machine’s broken. What the hell is a squirrel machine?
CCA #2: One of those things with the wheel, where the squirrels run around?
CCA #1: I don’t think we provide those.
CCA #2: What’s the problem?
CCA #1: He says it’s broken.
CCA #2: Is he feeding it enough?
2 Charlotte Street
Sackville, New Brunswick
Canadia
Auditor: Well, of course I'd rather pray to a waving kitten instead of a guy nailed on a cross. But it's blasphemous.
Watsonville, California
Overheard by: Calling HR Now
White female coworker, about guy holding exotic bird: That’s one of those talking birds.
Hispanic female coworker: Yeah, I’ve seen those before.
White female coworker: They can talk, but you can’t hold a conversation with them. They’re not that smart. They can’t answer when you ask them a question.
Hispanic female coworker: Uh-huh.
633 3rd Avenue
New York, New York
Overheard by: Appalled
Law firm partner: How much does it cost to raise a cock?
Cherry Hill, New Jersey
Teen girl, holding a bag with a dead bird inside: My grandfather called earlier about getting this bird checked for West Nile virus. He found it in his yard.
Office clerk: Ok, I remember talking to him this morning. I need to get some information from you first. Now, what was his name?
The girl’s eyes get big, and she looks at the bag.
Office clerk: No, not the bird’s name. I need to know your grandfather’s name.
616 Court Street
Oberlin, Louisiana
Overheard by: Vicky
Animal-savvy office girl: Kangaroos are really mean.
Ordinary office girl, thoughtfully: I would be too, if someone was like hopping in and out of my stomach all day long.
Virginia
Coworker: Dude, what's the best Chinese place for lunch?
Overweight secretary: Ruby Foo's, just below us!
Coworker: Thanks! (aside) See, the whale's good for something.
Manhattan, New York
