Client: Who owns the Internet?
Sales guy: Nobody.
Client: Well, somebody’s making money!
Web design firm
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: office peon
Client: Who owns the Internet?
Sales guy: Nobody.
Client: Well, somebody’s making money!
Web design firm
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: office peon
Sales guy: He was from another country. A made-up country, though.
8220 England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
Coworker #1: We should start a D&D game.
Coworker #2: Yeah. Let’s ask Ben* if he wants to play, too!
Coworker #1, yelling to Ben: Hey, want to play D&D later?
Ben, yelling back: No! I don’t play D&D!
Coworker #2: We thought you’d be a good Druid.
Ben, yelling back: Fuck that, I’m a thief acrobat!
Oshkosh, Wisconsin
Overheard by: Will
Sales guy, entering a meeting: Sorry I’m late…
Director of marketing: You brought doughnuts? Coffee?
Sales guy: No.
Director of marketing: Then you’re dead to us. Get out.
105 Madison Avenue
New York, New York
Business architect: I felt the difference once it was in my mouth!
120 Fairview Park
Virginia
Coworker #1: Snogging is heavily kissing… Not getting to third base.
Coworker #2: Oh. I thought snogging was a kind of drink.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Annabelle
Waiter: Is it your birthday today?
Customer: No.
Waiter: Oh, sorry. It’s just that there are a lot of birthdays this year.
Minot, North Dakota
Overheard by: Taggart Snyder
Drone #1: Hey, where were you Saturday night? The ladies were all up on this.
Drone #2: I went to a birthday party.
Drone #1: Hehehehe… What a dumb waste of time. Whose birthday party was it?
Drone #2: Mine.
Drone #1: Oh… Happy birthday.
377 South Oyster Bay Road
Plainview, New York
Overheard by: tonyg
Senior director to group of scientists: Well, it’s not like they’re just licking each other’s boobies!
Bay Area, California
Overheard by: marblecargirl
Photographer: Are you saying my cock is funny?
Culver City, California
Overheard by: LaLa Land
