They Told Me It Only Happens after Sex with Boys

Girl #1: I’m not pregnant.
Girl #2: Oh, good! I found out this weekend that I’m not pregnant, either.

Boarding high school dorm
Beverly, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Teacher in the hallway… like they were trying to go through this together?

Posted on April 20, 2020
Gossip, Massachusetts, Students

An Unexamined Life Not Being Worth Living

Student: You look very excited.
Professor: Yeah, ’cause I just peed!

Rolfe Hall, UCLA
Los Angeles, California

Overheard by: Josh M.

Posted on April 14, 2020
California, Feelings, Restroom, Students, Teachers, The Classroom

Finally Something Will Be Sucking Besides Your Grades

Teacher to students, in creepy deep voice: Want a lollipop? I have many flavors!

Sydney
Australia

Posted on March 21, 2020
Australia, Body Parts, Meals and Snacks, Offers and requests, Sexuality, Students, Teachers

I Think She’s Good for at Least Two or Three Short Marriages

College girl #1: I was talking with my dad about it over break, and he said I really shouldn’t worry about it because 90 percent of women get married. But if you think about it, that really isn’t a lot. I mean, what if I’m part of that 10 percent?
College girl #2: Well, that probably includes lesbians, though.
College girl #1: Yeah! That’s right! And disabled people!

Whitehead Road
Charlottesville, Virginia

Overheard by: Did she really say that?

Posted on January 4, 2020
Gossip, Students, Virginia

Psst– That's a “No”

40-something guy: So are you working now?
Recent college grad, buying beer: What do you mean?

Mamaroneck, New York

Overheard by: An employee who knows what 'work' means b/c of these people

Posted on December 28, 2019
New York, Questions, Strangers, Students, Words

Thank You, Mr. Snitcherson — I’ll Take It from Here

Male student entering Principal’s office: Someone’s been gluing pennies to the urinal again!

Arcadia, California

Overheard by: The Know It All

Posted on December 21, 2019
California, Gossip, Students

Bioterrorism, for Instance.

High school senior #1: I am thinking about taking pre-med, I just hope it's not hard. I kind of like science.
High school senior #2: Why not study business?
High school senior #1: Because in my thoughts business always fails, but science is always, like… good.

Fresno, California

Posted on October 11, 2019
California, Education, Questions, Science, Students, Wishes

Unless You Want to Be Skinny

College girl #1: I keep thinking I should smoke more often.
College girl #2: That’s probably not a valid assessment.

Binghamton University
Binghamton, New York

Posted on July 26, 2019
Comebacks, Education, General Idiocy, Health & Hygiene, New York, Students, Substance Use & Abuse

Johnson & Johnson Pharmaceuticals Is Twice-Blessed

Student #1: Is her name Johnson or Johnston?
Student #2: It's Johnston, stupid! “Johnson” is another way to say penis.

Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: Ms. Johnston

Posted on July 9, 2019
Body Parts, Canadia, Names, Questions, Students

Plus, Their Prior Behavior Had Been Exemplary

Professor: Does anyone have questions about the importance of the flood myth in the Bible and the Epic of Gilgamesh?
Student: Well, when it flooded and everything died, what happened to all the fish?
Professor: Well, it was a flood… So I think they were okay…

Skidmore College
Saratoga Springs, New York

Overheard by: Stared in disbelief

Posted on June 17, 2019
General Idiocy, New York, Students, Teachers

Students