Business user: So you're telling me that it will take six weeks to roll out this new bit of code to the stores?
Project manager: Yes.
Business user: This is ridiculous. Why can't we just have a set of rules that tells the systems what we want to do instead of inserting all this coding crap?
Project manager: Well, yes, we could do that.
Business user: Perfect! How long will it take to do that?
Project manager: About six weeks.
Wilkesboro, North Carolina
Overheard by: Firebabe
Cube girl #1: I am so excited! The Olympics start tonight and I love them!
Cube girl #2: Yeah they're pretty cool.
Cube girl #1: Cool?! I watch them every year!
Salem, North Carolina
Overheard by: Jessica B.
Nerdy office guy: I showed you my back hair before, haven't I?
Durham, North Carolina
Overheard by: The office Gossip
Minion: Right, let's go talk about foreskins!
Durham, North Carolina
Overheard by: So tired of foreskins
Female employee #1: Where does it say in my job description that I'm the aquarium maintenance person, the chocolate jockey, the expert on suicide?
Female employee #2: Yeah, but you asked for that one!
Female employee #1: Which one? The chocolate jockey?
Female employee #2: Yeah.
Female employee #3: Yee-haw! I'm riding my chocolate pony!
Winston-Salem, North Carolina
Girl in cubicle: I feel so professional today… I just googled Dow Jones.
Research Triangle Park
Durham, Raleigh
Warehouse guy: Where's David?
David, from his cubicle: Oh, they let him go, man. He's gone.
Warehouse guy: Uhhmm…
Charlotte, North Carolina
Annoying IT guy behind partition: Yo, dude, I need god status on this site so I can make changes.(laughs to himself) Hey, I need god status. (another employee enters the room) Hey, yo, I need god status on this site. God status. (laughs again)
Quiet IT girl on other side of partition: Shut up!
Raleigh, North Carolina
Session leader: Now at this point, if you've been convicted guilty of a felony crime, I'll have to ask you to leave.
(one woman starts to walk out of crowded auditorium, abruptly stops halfway)
Woman: Oh, wait! What is counterfeiting?
Session leader: Mam, were you guilty?
Woman: Yes. Oh, wait. No. The trial's still going on.
Mebane, North Carolina
Boss lady: So this list needs to be redone and given back to me. The deadline is July 1st.
New worker: But it's August 10th!
Boss lady: Oh, honey, you work for the Government now, nobody gets in a hurry when they work for the Government.
Raleigh,North Carolina
