Chick: Dude, you’re such a poser. You talk about food all day long and then go home and eat salad. You’re not a real fatty like me. Talk to me when you join the club.
500 West 4th Street
Winston-Salem, North Carolina
Chick: Dude, you’re such a poser. You talk about food all day long and then go home and eat salad. You’re not a real fatty like me. Talk to me when you join the club.
500 West 4th Street
Winston-Salem, North Carolina
Customer: Why did my policy cancel?
Secretary: For non-payment, sir.
Customer: But I never got a bill.
Secretary: You mean, the one you handed me when you walked in with a due date of January 30th*?
Customer: Yes, that bill.
Secretary: It wouldn’t have canceled if you had paid this bill, sir.
Customer: Well, I’m not going to renew that policy, then…
Secretary: There is nothing to renew, sir — it canceled for non-payment!
977 Yadkinville Road
Mocksville, North Carolina
Overheard by: Karen
Office girl: My mom said she almost wrecked her car the other day because she was watching Elvis pick up trash on the side of the road. My mom said he was picking up trash in his jumpsuit, right there on the side of the road.
Office guy: Elvis was doing a little community service, was he?
Charlotte, North Carolina
Customer: These new labels are awful. Just awful! Why did you change them? I hate them.
Pharmacist: I’m sorry, sir, but I don’t have any control over the labels.
Customer: They don’t even tell me when it’s time to refill my ‘scription. When am I supposed to refill my ‘scription?
Pharmacist: … When you run out of medication, sir.
Customer: Well, how in the hell am I supposed to know that?
CVS/Pharmacy
High Point, North Carolina
Peon on phone: No, no, I believe that you sent it. I just didn’t receive it. I even told Jen* that you wouldn’t drop the ball. You are on the ball. You are on balls I haven’t even seen yet.
Charlotte, North Carolina
Overheard by: OMG
Sales guy: Some people have 12 years’ experience. Some have 1 year’s experience 12 times.
8220 England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
Overheard by: carissa lusk
Sales guy: You know how people talk about the world-wide web? The Internet? How would you spell that? W-E-B?
8220 England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
African-American co-worker: So, maybe you can help me out with this, are Italians black or Latino?
Italian-American co-worker: I’m white. Just white, man.
African American co-worker: Maybe you didn’t understand the question.
4800 University Drive
Durham, North Carolina
Young male coworker to another: You are the only cat I wanna pet.
Raleigh, North Carolina
Repairman in elevator, to another: So, what’s wrong with having sex? People been havin’ sex for hundreds of years.
Research Drive
Durham, North Carolina
