Supervisor, watching The Apprentice: I like that British guy, I hope he wins. Or that English guy. Wait, what’s the difference?
Coworker: Are you kidding?
Supervisor: There’s a difference, right? Do they want to be called something else?
800 Market Street
St. Louis, Missouri
Overheard by: Erin Eff
Grunt: I’m sorry, Rick*. You’re gonna have to start over. I completely zoned out. I saw you standing there, and I heard you talking, and it sounded great, but…
10877 Watson Road
St. Louis, Missouri
Ranting coworker filling out deposit: Where do all the paper clips go? Everything gets paper-clipped together, and I never see the paper clips again! I’ll bet the bank takes all the paper clips from our deposits, puts them into little boxes and sells them back to us — that’s where the bank really makes its money, you know.
291 Highway
Liberty, Missouri
Overheard by: stealing the paper clips
Supervisor woman: I felt something back there and then it was all-out war in my pants!
Wildwood
Jefferson City, Missouri
Manager to lead: Go ahead and audit her drawer tonight. We're supposed to audit everyone once a week.
Cashier: Go ahead, since it'll be quick. How often are my drawers off anyway?
Passing coworker: Every. Night.
Lee's Summit, Missouri
Overheard by: Alicia
Sales: I am so cranky today. I must be getting my period.
Co-worker #1: Again? You just had it last week.
Sales: Yeah. The PMS starts every week Monday and ends on Friday.
Co-worker #2: That’s not PMS, that’s menopause.
11694 Lackland Road
St. Louis, Missouri
Receptionist on phone: I wish he'd understand that no movie he makes is worth anything unless Kenny Loggins has his finger in it.
Kansas City, Missouri
Incompetent data entry clerk: What can we do to fix this misunderstanding on my part?
St. Louis, Missouri
Attorney: I need a [investi]gator for a hand job.
Staff: Ha, ha! You mean a ‘hand delivery’?
South Jefferson Avenue
Springfield, Missouri
Overheard by: Left Lobe
Female coworker: How old do you think she is? Like 15 or 16?
Male coworker: Because I have no desire to make an appearance on the Megan's Law database, I respectfully decline to answer your question.
St. Louis, Missouri
Overheard by: JD
