Overly happy admin on phone, on administrative professional's day: Amanda made me cookies! (pause) I know! I want them to feel free to worship me whenever they want! Bowing is optional!
Kansas City, Missouri
Overheard by: and when exactly is computer monkey day?
Employee filling out sick leave slip: How do you spell “vasectomy”?
Coworker: I can look it up… My mom had one.
Independence, Missouri
Dude #1: I quit smoking last week.
Dude #2: How’s that going?
Dude #1: Well, I’m leaving early to go drinking.
St. Louis, Missouri
Girl searching through office freezer: Hey, I love cold pizza…wait a minute, this isn’t cold, this is frozen!
3701 S. Lindbergh Boulevard
St. Louis, Missouri
Overheard by: Brian Muench
Boss #1 to new lab worker: Okay, now we add the virus supernatant.
Boss #2: What are you doing now?
Boss #1: Adding the virus supernatant.
Boss #2: Oh… What is that?
Boss #1: Virus supernatant.
Boss #2: What is that?
Boss #1, irritated: Virus supernatant!
Boss #2: But what is it?
Boss #1: Virus supernatant!
Lab worker #1 to boss #2: Hey, Lou*, what is that? Is it virus supernatant?
Science research building
St. Louis, Missouri
Assistant manager: Where the hell did you go? I came up front, and a bunch of girls were dragging you out of the store.
Coworker, chuckling: They needed me to show them how to roll a joint.
Assistant manager: I didn’t hear that [walks away].
291 Highway
Liberty, Missouri
Manager of convenience store at Shell service station, to clerk, in front of customers: Jesus, I can't wait until this goddamned customer appreciation week is over.
Kansas City, Missouri
Overheard by: tallulah_iroquois
Quality assurance employee: Well, I gotta go test some stuff.
Developer: Okay, hope your eye doesn't explode!
St. Louis, Missouri
Overheard by: durp
Worker bee to another: … So she said it was fine that she’s smoking a pack a day while she’s pregnant. She doesn’t mind if the baby comes out a little small.
Another worker, from across the room: I’ve been smoking since I was 16, and my baby still isn’t born!
Chesterfield, Missouri
Overheard by: my mom smoked with me too…
