Ditzy intern: I know you’re busy so I’m not going to exasturbate things…
Suit: Oh, not at all… In fact, better that you exasturbate me than the boss.
1901 Main Street
Columbia, South Carolina
Ditzy intern: I know you’re busy so I’m not going to exasturbate things…
Suit: Oh, not at all… In fact, better that you exasturbate me than the boss.
1901 Main Street
Columbia, South Carolina
Intern walking out of bathroom, correcting exiting friend: But if you aren't in a group when you play gay chicken, then it's just two dudes afraid of making out.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: So stop asking
Bitter intern to cheerful intern: Jeez, stop being so motivated and shit. The only thing I’m actively doing today is refraining from eating magic mushrooms at my desk.
Rockefeller Plaza
New York City, New York
Intern: I'd tap that.
Boss: What?!
Intern: I mean…I'd like to talk about mutual funds with that.
Boston, Massachusetts
Temp: I think if I were to have two daughters, I would name them “Armada” and “Militia.”
Wall Street
Manhattan, New York
Intern: You’d expect building 233 to be right next to 230, but 230 is, like, totally inside and 233 is totally, like, right here.
NASA Ames Research Center
California
Overheard by: shyinvisiblegirl
Temp: All the food here is good, especially the bacon. I mean, this is real bacon, not the kind you buy at the store.
Culinary school
Pasadena, California
Overheard by: I’m surrounded by idiots
Fellow intern: I think my goal for the next eight months in this company is to become a professional foosball player.
Yaletown
Canadia
Intern, about weekend: My favorite monk wasn’t in my meditation class, which was upsetting!
202 West 1st Street
Los Angeles, California
Intern #1: Sorry, I can't go out tonight. I have to get a tattoo.
Intern #2: Oh, what are you getting?
Intern #1: This proverb: “time wasted can never be reclaimed.”
Intern #2: That's deep.
Intern #1: Yeah, it was between that and a lollipop on my hand. But I did a Twitter poll and they voted on the proverb.
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Hanly
