Guy looking at office apprentice: Fugly! Just fugly! Shit, that wasn't in my head.
Dover
England
Guy looking at office apprentice: Fugly! Just fugly! Shit, that wasn't in my head.
Dover
England
T-shirt: Why are you wearing a suit?
Suit: I had court this morning.
T-shirt: Traffic Court? Did you pay a fine?
Suit: Yeah, Traffic Court. The fine was five hundred dollars.
T-shirt: You should have worn a different suit. That one looks like it cost about forty dollars.
Suit: I paid seven hundred dollars for this.
T-shirt: You got ripped off.
Suit: Well whoever’s been giving you that piece of shit baseball brim haircut the last year has been ripping you off.
T-shirt: I wear a toupee.
2211 N. First Street
San Jose, California
Overheard by: daimaoh
Partner: Fuck that!…Fuck you! I am not cheap! I want what’s rightfully my client’s!
200 Park Avenue
New York, NY
Overheard by: GJG
Customer #1 (sitting in waiting area waiting for prescription for 40 minutes): (cough cough hack hack wheeze)
Customer #2: Oh, you sound awful, I hope you haven't been waiting long.
Customer #1: I've been here for almost an hour watching the dance of the dipshits that's going on behind the counter.
Customer #2: There's entertainment now?
CVS Pharmacy
Hamilton, New Jersey
Overheard by: Currrly!
Network admin: Yeah, I saw Aladdin in the theater.
Help desk supervisor: That’s because you’re a faggot.
Network admin: No, it’s because I have kids.
Help desk supervisor: Well, your kids are faggots, too.
Princeton, New Jersey
Overheard by: Frank
Black girl peon #1: That girl is so annoying. She is so happy all the time.
Black girl peon #2: I know, right? It’s like she has butterflies coming out of her mouth or something.
Washington, DC
Boss: Just tell him to call me on my mobile.
Employee: Okay.
Boss: Oh, wait, you’ve probably never heard of that since you’re not from New York. It’s the same thing as a cell phone.
2130 H Street NW
Washington, DC
Worker #1: Oh, damn! Would you look at that? I have on two different pair of shoes.
Worker #2: You’re just now relizing that? The day’s almost over with…what a dumbass!
Worker #1: Yeah whatever, maybe I’ll switch them out tomorrow. At least they are the same color.
210 Main Street
Dallas, Georgia
Woman at the copier: I'm not saying she's a whore, just that she likes penis more than her kids.
Jackson, Tennessee
Boss: How many servers do you think Google has?
Lackey: Infinite.
Boss: Infinite? You’re a retard.
15 Alatarinda Road
Orinda, California
Overheard by: choking on a brownie
